Fighting the Darkness
by Sehrezad
Summary: It's not always easy to find happiness in life… it's definitely not easy for Ziva, especially when the past wouldn't let her move on… That is her story trying to find her home in a world where she's been left all alone… Zibbs with a little McAbby
1. Alone

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything connecting to the show. I just coul__dn't help reading something extra into the original storyline…_

_Summary: It's not always easy to find happiness in life… it's definitely not easy for Ziva, especially when the past wouldn't let her move on… That is her story trying to find her home in a world where she's been left all alone…_

_Hey there, Everyone! This is my very first NCIS fanfiction. I hope you'll like it… and I certainly hope that I'll be able to get to the end of it…_

_Spoilers for Kill Ari!_

_Here we go!!!_

Chapter 1: Alone

"I want to see you." Ziva told her brother. It might not have been the right time but she missed her big brother terribly. Granted that they talked on the phone frequently but nowadays it was always about business… nothing personal. If they talked, Ari always acted as her superior and it wasn't enough for her, not when her brother was accused of murdering an American Special Agent with cold blood. She so desperately needed to see him…

"Too risky." Ari crashed down Ziva's hope and she felt disappointed. She felt abandoned like a little girl who didn't get enough attention from her family. The officer in her, though, knew that Ari was right. "Gibbs will have you followed. We will meet in Paris after the mission is over, Ziva. I promise."

The mere fact that Ari promised it, made the Mossad officer feel better somehow. Ari always kept his promises, always.

"Ari, I do not want to loose you, too." She said allowing the little girl in her to take over for a moment.

"You will not." Ziva waited for the usual 'I promise' here, too, if for nothing else just to reassure herself, but this time it didn't come and Ari ended the conversation with a curt 'Shalom' leaving his sister with a bad feeling.

She shook it off… she couldn't loose her brother… she wouldn't have anybody then… she would be left all alone… and that would not happen. She wouldn't let it happen.

***

_Six-year-old Ziva David stormed into her room with red face, which was stained by large hot tears, and threw herself on her bed. She found it all so unfair. After all nobody asked for that baby to come into their home. She definitely didn't ask for it._

"_Hey, come on, Zee. Do not sulk like a little girl." Her brother sat down next to her on the bed and put a comforting hand on her back._

"_I am a little girl, Ari." She informed her brother with a voice muffled by her pillow. Despite her tears, Ari could hear a little giggle escaping her sister's lips but Ziva didn't give up on sulking. Of course, she didn't, thought Ari with a smile, after all her sister was as stubborn as a mule._

"_Alright, little girl, then tell me why you are sulking." For a little while he didn't get any king of answer from the girl but then Ziva sat up on the bed and looked at her older brother with big brown eyes, which were red because of the tears._

"_It is so not fair." She stated with conviction. Ari just raised an eyebrow clearly not understanding the reasons of his sister's previous outburst. They were peacefully playing in the family room when Ziva just jumped up shouting some nasty words at her father who, in returned, reprimanded her and sent her up to her room. "Talia." She clarified. "Why did she have to come here? Nobody asked for her to come. Why is she here then?" She clearly didn't understand the situation._

"_Ziva, she is our sister."_

"_And?"_

"_She is family."_

"_And am I not family anymore?"_

"_Of course, you are, Zee. Do not be silly."_

"_Then why does Aba not like me anymore?"_

"_But he does like you, Zee. Do not say things that are not true."_

"_He does not like me anymore. I know it. I am not his princess anymore and he is shouting with me. He never shouts with me, ever. And he calls Talia princess all the time now. My Aba does not like me anymore." Fresh tears began to appear in her eyes, which made Ari pull her into his arms and began gently rocking his little sister._

_He was only ten years old but he saw the situation clearly and he was really angry with his father, who had indeed showed preference towards his youngest daughter ever since she was brought home._

_After a while he felt Ziva wriggle in his arms so he pulled away and looked at her._

"_Are you going to stop loving me, too, Ari?" She asked innocently with large sad eyes. At this question, Ari suddenly jumped up from the bed and ran out of the room. He returned quickly, though, and settled down in front of his sister with crossed legs._

"_Look here." He told her and produced something out of the pocket of his sweater. Little Ziva's eyes lit up when she saw what the object was and happily reached for it when Ari held it out for her. "Here. I give it to you." He watched with a loving smile as Ziva took the little plush toy into her hands. They had found it in the bazaar that summer and Ari bought it on his saved pocket money. It was a little gorilla… a dark purple gorilla which was holding an even smaller baby gorilla, which was as purple as the bigger one. He liked it so much because Ziva liked it. He would never forget her eyes when she had spotted it in one of the hidden corners of the bazaar…_

"_Look, the gorilla is always having the smaller one in its arms." He began to explain it to Ziva. "It will never leave it. And I will never leave you, Ziva. Even if I am not here with you. Do you understand me?" Ziva nodded as she looked at her brother. "Good. It will remind you of just how much I love you, little sister, and that I will love you forever, no matter what."_

_Suddenly Ziva threw her arms around her brother's neck and embraced him with such force that surprised the little boy._

"_I love you, Ari."_

"_I love you, too, Princess."_

***

Ziva slowly lowered her gun and, as if in trance, she walked down the stairs.

She couldn't believe it. Once again she did what her father told her to do. She killed her brother. She killed the last person who truly loved her… What did it make her? If Ari thought that he had been a monster then what could Ziva possibly call herself?

She stopped by the lifeless body of Ari and just looked at him. What had she done?

She was snapped out of her thoughts by the man whose life she had just saved.

"His father is the Deputy Director of Mossad?" He asked trying to put the pieces into their places.

"Yes." Ziva nodded several times still trying to deal with what had just happened.

"Not David…" She just wished that. She could still be able to look into the mirror if it hadn't been Ari lying on the floor with a hole in his head. Would it have been anybody else… Would it have been their father…

"Yes." But it wasn't somebody else. It was her brother. "He is my half-brother." Her best friend.

She was left alone with nobody to trust and nobody to love her…

As she sat down and began to sing to his dead brother, she just hoped to God that Leroy Jethro Gibbs was worth her sacrifice…

**TBC**

_So that was the first chapter…_

_Thanks for reading and sorry for the mistakes!_


	2. Out of Control

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

_Hey there, I'm glad that you are still with me. Now we jump to the end of Legend in season 6…_

_Enjoy!_

Chapter 2: Out of Control

Ziva was lying in bed next to a man she once called a friend but whom she now despised. Over a course of time Michael Rivkin became the embodiment of all the things she wanted to leave behind. All the lies, the disappointments and loneliness… She just didn't seem to be able to get rid of them… They followed her everywhere…

And as she was lying there in the darkness unable to sleep, her mind wandered back to that time when everything had got out of control…

"_What the hell did you tell Rivkin, Father?" Ziva stormed into her father's office clearly pissed off. Eli David, though, didn't show any sign of sur__prise or annoyance regarding his daughter's sudden appearance. He simply looked up from his work with a calm expression and regarded her fuming daughter while he took off his glasses._

"_Watch your mouth, Daughter." He told her in an impassive voice, which made Ziva even angrier._

_She slapped her hands on the table and leant closer to her father, her eyes throwing daggers at him._

"_I will not do that and I demand an answer, damn it. Now."_

"_That is enough, Ziva. You are not to make a scene in this office. You are making me upset with this behavior. Have you really forgotten everything you had learnt from me?"_

_For several moments there was silence in the office and the two Davids continued regarding each other. The Director's eyes were deadly calm while his daughter's were burning with rage. Finally, as always when faced with her father, Ziva was the one, who backed off._

_She let out a frustrated sigh then turned away from the desk. With her back to her father, she took several deep breaths to compose herself then turned back to him and posed her question in a different manner._

"_Tell me, Father, why does Rivkin think that I am in any way interested in him?" It was a stupid question, she knew that, as she had a fairly good guess why her once good friend was thinking what he was thinking. She wanted to hear it from her father, though. She wanted him to come out with it openly and stop playing games with her._

"_Why, Ziva…" The Director began patronizingly as he stood up and walked to his daughter. "Michael Rivkin is a good man and I know that you were such good friends."_

"_Father…" Ziva started to say but her father's lifted finger and his stern look made her stop._

"_He is that kind of man whom I would be happy to see next to my only daughter. I would happily greet him in my family."_

_Ziva couldn't help snorting into his father's face._

"_I see, Father." She leant closer to him. "I am sure you would like a son like him." She particularly spat at him. "He is quite easy to manipulate. You would have a much easier task than you had with Ari, yes?"_

_Ziva saw her father's fists curl into a tight ball and recognized the rising anger in his eyes, but she didn't even flinch. He wouldn't hit her. No, he would never get physical._

"_Watch yourself, Ziva. I am your father. I know what is best for you and you owe me obedience." It wasn't only his eyes which lost their calmness, his voice also became dangerously low by that point. And still, Ziva didn't back away._

"_So now I am to marry a man for whom I do not feel anything." It wasn't a question. She knew all too well what her father's intentions were. And she didn't like it one bit._

"_As I said, Michael is a good man. He will do you good, of that I am sure."_

"_Of course you are, Father. But I am done playing the role of one of your puppets. I will not bend as you wish and I am certainly not going to marry Rivkin. Ever." The fire in her eyes was intense showing all the determination with which she was facing the older man._

_A__gain father and daughter stood in silence, their eyes not leaving the others'. And this time it was the Director, who broke their staring contest. He gave her a knowing smile, which made Ziva's stomach twist in knots, then he turned away from her and walked to his window._

"_Of course you are not. I was fairly sure that you would not be so easy to convince. But there is one thing, Ziva, that you should bear in mind when you make your decision."_

_Ziva narrowed her eyes. She had already heard enough. And this time she wouldn't let her father manipulate her. She was done with his games. Done forever. It had already cost her so much._

"_You cannot say anything that would make me change my mind, Father." Now her voice was cold, the heat of her anger had disappeared. She felt exhausted. "Not anymore." And with that she started towards the door but her father's voice stopped her before she could open it._

"_Just think about my granddaughter, Ziva." Director David's voice was measured, delivered very carefully just to make sure that they would get the desired reaction._

_They did._

_In an instant Ziva turned around disbelief written all over her face. The Director smirked satisfied._

"_Have I mentioned that Rivkin is willing to take in your bastard child, to raise her as his own?" He didn't say anything else just watched as Ziva was trying to process the information that she had just been given._

_She__ was stunned. Of all the things that she had expected her father to say, it didn't even occur to her. Avigail. Her baby girl… But she died almost four years ago. She saw the village with her own eyes after the attack… She went there… She spent weeks there looking for her daughter… She buried her daughter._

"_What did you just say?" Her voice was weak and her expression was uncertain. One part of her refused to believe what she had just heard but the other part wanted to believe it so desperately._

"_Think about it that way: Michael Rivkin__ is your only chance to have your daughter back." And with that final blow the Director sat back to his desk and continued working as if nothing had happened. He knew that he had won. Again._

_Ziva's mind was still working frantically trying to find answers to the suddenly emerged question__s. Then realization hit her and her features hardened. Everything seemed so clear at that moment… she felt sick… She had always known that her father always gets what he wants. Hell, she knew that he didn't play by the rules all the time. And she was well aware of the fact that she, herself, had been used countless times just to help her father achieve his goals. They had their share of fights about that over the years. But she believed in him, she honestly believed in him._

_She didn't know what to believe anymore. Now it wasn't about just some withhold information… it wasn't about using his influence to achieve something. This time it was about her… and her baby. Was he really that heartless? Of course, he was._

_Suddenly she couldn't recognize the man in front of her. He was a complete stranger. He was a monster and all she wanted to do was to pull out her gun and... __Her hand unconsciously reached for the gun on her hip but when she felt the cold metal in her hand, she stopped. She couldn't do it, no matter how much she wanted to do it. He had her daughter, strangely enough that one she did not doubt._

_And s__he could have her daughter back… all she had to do was to smile and accept Michael Rivkin's affection… it seemed simple enough…_

_For a moment she slumped back against the door and closed her eyes in trepidation then she straightened up and walked up to her father's desk… and waited. When finally the Director looked up, her features were schooled not giving away any of her inner turmoil. The Director's eyes were questioning as if it had been the first time that morning that he had seen his daughter. Ziva gave him a faint smile. The all too familiar game had begun once again…_

"_Shalom, Father." She began and shuddered when she got a warm smile in return. How could their relationship reach to that point? Was it always that way and she was just too blinded by her unquestionable admiration of her father? The warning words of her brother and her lover echoed in her ears now. They could see the real Eli David… and both of them were dead now._

"_Come here, Daughter, give your father a kiss." Ziva stepped to his father and kissed him dutifully. "Now, I hope everything is all right and you are ready to leave for Morocco today." Ziva just nodded silently. "Good." The Director smiled satisfied. "Now, go and get ready." He patted her cheek affectionately. "And tell Michael that I send him my best wishes." With that he turned back to his work and Ziva slowly left the room. Defeated and worn but with such a hope that would help her through anything that would come… Her daughter was alive._

And now lying in the arms of Rivkin, the mere thought of her daughter brought a sad smile to her lips.

She was worried, tough. It'd been months since her confrontation with her father and so many things had happened since then. And not once did she hear her father mention Avigail again. At times she wondered whether Eli David had told her the truth and she really had a chance to see her daughter again. But she had to believe… She wanted to believe because at that moment it was the only thing that kept her going… Without that hope she had nothing.

**TBC**

_Thanks for reading and, again, sorry for the mistakes!_


	3. Still Alive

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

_Here's Chapter 3, I think you'll know where we are now…_

Chapter 3: Still Alive

"I had nothing but death in my heart." She told Gibbs with a steady voice her gaze never wavering from the searching blue eyes. Gibbs was taken aback by her tone, though his expression remained expressionless. He wondered why his friend, who never gave up without a fight, had given up living and why she was talking about it with such stoic acceptance… everything about her was screaming defeat as if she had lost the reason to fight.

And that was the truth. She had lost everything that had ever mattered in her life. She tried so hard to go on after everything that happened during the years… to make peace with herself, but in the end it all crashed down and she was left betrayed and alone.

"You never had a choice." Gibb told her in a low voice. "He didn't give you a choice. He raised you to be a ruthless, soulless killer." There was nothing new in Gibbs' statement. She thought Eli David to be a monster but in truth, she wasn't any better than her father.

But Gibbs was wrong in one thing, though. She had a choice. It was either him or her… and she had made her choice…

_Ziva hated it… that unnatural calmness that always seemed to dwell in her father's eyes. Even now, being held at gunpoint__ by his own daughter, he didn't show anything but confidence. As if he knew that she would not pull the trigger…_

_But Ziva was determined… she would not back off… not this time… there was no reason to…_

_So many things were whirling __in her mind… so many emotions. She was confused, upset, disappointed but above all she was angry. She felt such intensive anger that she hadn't known she was capable of… And all of that unlimited rage was aimed solely at the man sitting in front of her…_

…_at the man whom she had worshiped as a child. She placed him on a pedestal so high that it was impossible for her to see in him anything but her hero… the strong and confident man who was fighting for his belief… who was honest and honorable… who loved his family. She stubbornly protected her image of her father and it didn't matter how many time she had to disappoint in him, she was never ready to give up on him… she always found an excuse for him._

_She would have followed her father to hell and back without hesitation… and she really did just that…_

_She fought for him…_

_She killed for him…_

_She ki__lled the man she loved for him…_

_She had stood in front of her lover just like she was standing in front of her father now… with a gun pressed against his head. She pulled the trigger then… and she couldn't pull the trigger now…_

_Staring into her father's eyes, she wanted to blame him for everything…for turning her into a monster… for killing the father of her child… for losing her baby… for killing her brother…for making her leave her new family behind… but she couldn't do it. She couldn't do it simply because she had to realize that it had been her all along… just her… she should have known better… She should have been more critical about her father… she should have believed in Anwar's innocence… she should not have let her baby out of her reach… she should have seen the change in her brother… and she should have trusted her team, her friends…_

_But it didn't matter anymore. She was left alone with nobody to blame but herself and with only one thing to do._

_Ever so slowly s__he lowered her weapon and threw it on her father's desk._

_She would complete the mission Michael had started… she would do one last thing for her father…_

…_and she would die doing so._

"I did not mean to live through it." It was painfully clear for Gibbs that she had not even thought about the possibility of being rescued. She knew that Eli David wouldn't move a finger to have her back, and Gibbs could only guess how that fact had made her feel. He had his fair share of questionable businesses but, at the end of the day, he always had somebody to make him feel a worthy human being once again. The woman in front of him, on the other hand, had been sent to die by her own father. And the worst part of it was that he himself had turned his back on her.

Seeing the woman, who began to mean so much for him during the years, sitting on the other side of the table broken and lost, he swore that he would never leave her again. And he would always make sure that she knew that she was not alone. He would be there for her no matter what…

"You didn't. That part of you died out there." Gibbs told her willing her to understand that she wouldn't be left behind. Not this time…

"I am sorry… Gibbs." Gibbs knew that she wasn't seeking forgiveness. She didn't need it, not from him at least because the only person who could forgive her was Ziva herself. But he could give her something else so he stood up and walked up next to her to whisper something into her ear then he kissed her head and left the room.

_That other part of you, Ziva… she is love__d here. Don't ever forget that._ This honest acceptance of her and Gibbs's openly expressed affection finally made her cry. But for the first time in months she didn't feel lost. She felt hope… She hoped that there was a place for her after all in the world and she hoped that she would be able to find her way home… wherever it might be… Now she wanted to find a way… she wanted to fight…

Ziva was shaking with laughter after an exceptionally amusing story of Ducky, and the others weren't exceptions, either. She tried to calm herself down somehow so she took a sip from her wine but it turned out to be a bad idea as at that moment Tony added a nasty comment to the story and Ziva ended up choking on her wine. And she still couldn't stop laughing…

Between the coughs she suddenly felt a hand stroking her back trying to sooth her reaction to the wayward liquid. She looked up and saw that the hand belonged to her boss. His hand felt so good on her back but then the coughs stopped and Gibbs withdrew his hand. She gave him a warm, though a little bit disappointed smile which was returned by the normally stoic ex-marine and the smile she got warmed her whole being.

She leant back in her seat and took a moment just to observe the people around her. It was strange but then and there she felt home. She was still fighting with her demons and she was sure that she would continue to do so for a very long time but at that moment in a little smoky bar in Washington, it all seemed that everything was alright in the world… even if for only a few hours.

"So, birthday girl…" Tony snapped her out of her thoughts. "…what were you wishing when you blew out the candles?" At that question every head turned towards her expectantly but she had to disappoint them.

"I did not wish for anything." She simply told them.

"Come on, Ziva…" Abby whined like a little child. "…everybody makes a wish at their birthdays."

Ziva was about to tell her that a few weeks ago she hadn't even thought about being alive long enough to greet that day and even now she had difficulties to grasp the concept of a future, but fortunately she could hear Gibbs' voice from her left speak up.

"Abs…" He began with a slight warning in his tone. "…even if she made a wish, I'm sure you don't want it to come into nothing."

Understanding downed on the Goth's features and with a guilty 'sorry' she was ready to drop the subject. She added, however, that it was Tony in the first place who had begun the inquiry and this led to an at least thirty-minute-debate between the two of them, which the others observed with great interest and even greater amusement.

It was McGee who finally broke up the argument by grabbing Abby's hand and practically pulling her to the dance floor. Following his example, Tony offered his hand to Ziva, which she accepted and together they made their way into the crowd. When the song was over they turned to go back to their table but they bumped into Gibbs, who also claimed a dance with the 'birthday girl'. Tony left with a smile and Ziva tentatively stepped into Gibbs' awaiting arms. They hadn't been swaying to the music for very long when an awkward looking Palmer appeared next to the couple stuttering something that sounded very much like 'it's my turn'. Gibbs just rolled his eyes but Ziva accepted Palmer's hand with a warm smile.

It seemed like an eternity when Ziva finally returned to the table with Gibbs on her side. After dancing with each and every member of the team, and that meant Abby, too, as she, much to Tony's satisfaction, insisted that she couldn't be left out, Ziva ended up with the ex-marine once again and they spent quite some time just gently swaying to the music. Surprisingly enough Gibbs was an excellent dancer and Ziva found herself willing the music not to stop. It didn't but after a couple of glasses of wine and in the safety of her boss' arms, Ziva couldn't help getting sleepy. That was when finally Gibbs led her back to the others.

They spent a little more time just chatting silently, well except for Tony who couldn't stop bragging about the pictures he had taken of Abby and Ziva. The young woman mentally cringed dreading the fights with the other agent about deleting the photos. Somehow, she suspected that before the inevitable destructions of the pictures, they would end up on the plasma more than once. But that was for another day…

It was Ducky who stood up first to leave, quickly followed by Palmer, who offered a ride for the old ME. Tony made his exit, too, after spotting an attractive redhead by the counter, but not before planting a kiss on Ziva's head and wishing her once again a happy birthday. The rest of the team remained sitting and ordered another round of drinks. Being pleasantly sleepy, neither of them paid enough attention to the sitting arrangements that had somehow developed by that point. Abby was practically snuggled up next to McGee, who held her close with his arm around her waist while Ziva was leant back in her seat immensely enjoying the fact that Gibbs' arm, which he had stretched out behind her, ended up on her shoulders. Apparently the older agent didn't have any problem with it, either.

After Abby's drink had run out, she practically jumped up pulling McGee with her then stated that they were leaving for home. Gibbs raised an eyebrow while Ziva giggled under her nose as they watched the two of them leave the bar looking more like a couple than just two friends.

"Come on, Ziver." Gibbs turned to the woman while he stood up. "I'll walk you home." She nodded grateful for the offer then accepted the outstretched hand to help her up, too.

Once outside the building, they slowly began their way towards Ziva's apartment building. In the somewhat cool night air, Ziva suddenly felt lightheaded. She stopped for a little just to focus her hazy vision and steady herself somehow. She could hear Gibbs chuckling next to her and cracking some jokes about her present condition but she couldn't care less. She was too sleepy and she was enjoying herself too much. Not to mention that after a little while she could feel his arm around her shoulder… They walked like that until they reached Ziva's house.

"Thank you." Ziva whispered when Gibbs pulled her into a hug and place a kiss on her forehead.

"For what?" He asked pulling away. Somehow he knew that it wasn't for walking her home.

"For dragging me out tonight." She gave him a small sleepy smile. "I really had a good time."

"Any time, Ziver… anytime." He told her with a slight nod then took his time to turn around and leave. "Happy birthday, Ziva." Ziva gave him a final smile then he was gone. He hadn't got very far, though, because Ziva called to him. He turned around and waited for the young woman to talk.

"Can I…" She seemed uncertain as she tried to compose her question. "Can I call you tonight?"

The question surprised Gibbs. Since their talk in the interrogation room some weeks ago, Ziva called him whenever she couldn't sleep. They would spend the long hours of the night talking, or, given their not so communicative nature, in silence over the phone. However, not once did Ziva bring up the subject. And he didn't press it. It just happened.

"You don't have to ask, Ziva." His voice was serious as he looked into her dark eyes. "I'm here for you whenever you need me. Never doubt that."

Ziva nodded solemnly unable to voice her gratitude towards the man, who helped her in so many ways since her returned from Somalia. Gibbs didn't say anything more, either. He just nodded with a warm smile then continued walking.

"Never will." Ziva finally whispered into the night while she was watching the man disappear then she turned, too, to enter the building.

**TBC**

_Thanks for reading and sorry for the mistakes!_


	4. Seeing the Light

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I still don't own anything..._

_Hey, there! Thank you so much for your reviews and the subscriptions! Here is the next chapter... Enjoy!!!_

Chapter 4: Seeing the Light

Ducky entered the morgue early in the morning… very early in the morning. On his way to his desk he fleetingly registered the body lying on one of the tables. But there was something unusual about that body… it was breathing…

"Jethro, I certainly hope that you didn't spend the night here." He said with a slight smile while he went on with his morning routine in the darkened morgue.

"Well, Ducky", came the husky reply but not from his friend. "I can assure you that he had not spent the night here." The ME stopped mid-movement and slowly turned towards the voice.

"Ziva, my dear, what are you doing here?" He asked his visitor clearly surprised. Ziva sat up on the table and stretched her stiff muscles.

"I was just waiting for Abby to get me some results and I just thought that I might as well come down here… to think." The Israeli woman almost looked sheepish as she explained her presence. Ducky gave her a small smile than continued making his morning tea. After the water had begun to boil, he produced two cups and went to sit down in front of Ziva, who hadn't moved from her sitting position. Apparently she hadn't got ahead with her thinking as she looked quite troubled for the ME.

"Well, my dear, I am all ears if you feel like talking…" Ducky offered and Ziva was about to protest when he stopped her. "…but, of course, if you just want to sit here and drink a cup of tea with my old self in companionable silence, it is alright with me as well."

Ziva smiled gratefully at her old friend while she took the offered cup then they settled into a comfortable silence. For a while the only sound that could be heard in the dark room was the clattering of the spoons in the cups.

"I think that I am in love, Ducky." Ziva stated solemnly as she studied her reflection in the dark liquid.

"You think?" Ducky chuckled slightly. He was glad that Ziva had started a conversation after all.

"Well…" She sounded uncharacteristically unsure as she looked up at her companion. "I know that I am in love… but it is so complicated, Ducky."

"Is this feeling mutual?" The old man inquired curiously while Ziva returned observing herself in her cup.

"Yes, I think so."

"Then there is nothing complicated about it, Ziva."

"You could not know that." Her voice now sounded harsh as she snapped up her head but, almost instantly, her expression softened and looked at Ducky apologetically. "I am sorry, Ducky. I did not mean to snap, I just…"

"It's alright, dear, just tell me, what do you find so complicated?" His voice was warm and kind and Ziva couldn't help pouring out her heart to the man sitting in front of her. In a way, she was glad that there was somebody to listen to her.

"I feel so conflicted, Ducky." She began slowly in a low voice not really sure of herself, but after looking up at Ducky, she pulled herself together and continued. "You know that in Somalia I was ready to die, I did not even think about surviving it. And yet, here I am. And I do not know what to think of myself. After I had stayed in Israel, I had to face some things and none of it was pleasant. I had to realize who I really am. I am a bad person, Ducky, maybe worse than my father. But I accepted it. That is why I went to Somalia. It offered me a way out… But now it is all gone, and do not misunderstand me, I am happy to be back here… with my family." Here she smiled when the doctor reached out to take her hand. "But now I have to live with myself day after day. I am trying so hard to move on, to forget all the things I had done but it is so difficult and no matter what I do, I am still disgusted with myself. You see my point, Ducky?" She searched the man's eyes for confirmation. "If I do not know how to accept what I am, how can anybody else do that?" As she posed her final question, Ducky felt his friend's desperation so he stood up and stepped next to her, pulling her into a half hug.

"You know, my dear…" He began whispering into her hair with a small smile. "If there is a person on the planet, who is able to accept everything you are, Jethro is that person."

At the mention of her boss' name, Ziva's head instantly snapped up and looked at the ME as a deer caught in the headlight.

"How…" She began dumbstruck.

"Now, I hope you didn't think that you could fool this old man, Ziva, did you?" He chuckled maintaining his hold on her shoulder. Ziva couldn't help smiling at him then leant her head back to his shoulder.

"What shall I do, Ducky?" She sighed.

"Well, I have a feeling that our Jethro is just waiting for you to decide what you want so I suggest that you should not hesitate any longer. Talk to him. And let time take care of the other things. I'm sure that if you are ready, you will let the past go and you'll be able to see that beautiful warm-hearted young lady whom we all see in you." Ziva smiled at the warm words of the doctor. "And until then, my dear Ziva, you know that we can see our better half in the other's eyes…" With that Ducky placed a gentle kiss on her head and let her go.

Ziva hesitated for a little while but then she slowly climbed down from the table and after a warm hug and a 'thank you', she left the morgue.

Ducky watched as she left with a smile on his face. Somehow he had a feeling that everything would be just alright…

* * *

_Ziva hastily stepped into the cool apartment seeking refuge from the hot Syrian sun. The curtains were closed and she welcomed the semi-darkness. The last few days were quite stressful and now that the mission was over, she began to feel the exhaustion hit her with full force._

_She quickly threw her purse down on the couch and with the same movement she reached up behind her head and began to take off her hijab. When it was off of her head she let her hair loose and sig__hed in relief. Well, playing the part of a Muslim wife wasn't an easy task…_

_After grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge, she made her way to the bedroom to change. She was in a pair of denim shorts and her bra when she passed the mirror on her way to grab a tank top. When she caught a glimpse of herself in it, she stopped and stared at her reflection._

_Ever so slowly a dreamy smile appeared on her face and her hand went up to rest on her still flat belly. She still found it so unbelievable that there was a child growing in there. Among all the cruel things of the world that she and Anwar had to face day after day and after all those lives they had to take, they had managed to create one… Her smile grew even wider as she was thinking about her unborn child but it was quickly replaced by a worried frown._

_Faintly she heard the front door open but she didn't make a move. There was only one person who could cross that door without warning. And sure enough, moments later she could she her lover's form appear in the bedroom door. The tall dark man stopped there for several minutes just watching the woman in front of the mirror then stepped behind her and sneaked his arms around her waist pulling her closer._

"_Marhaban, my love." He breathed into her neck as she melted into him. "Something on your mind? You look worried."_

"_I am worried, Anwar." She told him. "What will happen when my father finds out about us… about the baby?"_

"_Well, he will be one pissed off son of a bitch." He answered chuckling slightly but Ziva looked at him scandalized. "Sorry, my love, but you know what I think about that...." He didn't get to finish his thought because Ziva spun around in his arms and put a finger on his mouth giving him a warning look. Anwar smiled at his lover's stubborn protectiveness of her father. He kissed the finger which rested on his lips then turned around and went to lie down on the bed._

_Ziva grabbed a tank top from the wardrobe and joined him on the bed wrapping herself around the man. For a little while they just lay there in silence but then Ziva spoke up._

"_I was serious, Anwar. I am really concerned about his opinion."_

"_I know, Ziva. Believe me, I know." He pulled her closer. "And Ari an__d I have already talked about our situation." Surprised, Ziva lifted her head to look at the man._

"_What did you talk about?"_

"_The possibilities… You know very well how the Deputy Director will react when he finds out that his daughter has fallen in love with a Muslim man."_

"_Anwar, it is not about religion…"_

"_Maybe not for you, my love…" Anwar stoked her cheek affectionately and Ziva leant into his touch as if it had the power to make her forget all about her problems. "…but your father cannot see beyond his grand mission and I know that you will tell me that I am one of his men but it is just an insignificant detail… and you told me yourself, you are worried, too."_

_For a while Ziva just looked into the loving dark brown eyes which were regarding her patiently. She was desperately trying to make sense of her confused thoughts. On the one hand she couldn't imagine her father not being happy for her, after all Eli David wasn't only her superior but he was her father, too… But on the other hand, she knew all too well what her father thought about the Muslims working for Mossad…_

_Finally she sighed sadly not being able to make any sense at all._

"_Why does it have to be so complicated?" She asked Anwar as she buried her face into his shoulder._

"_Well, we can make it easy." He answered in a silent voice while he stroked her hair._

"_You are talking about leaving Mossad." Ziva stated flatly. Somehow she had always known that that day would come. She had to choose between her father and the man she loved._

"_Just think about it, Ziva. __This is not our fight, maybe it has never been. We are just the pawns in the game of other people. And it is a dangerous game. I do not want our children to grow up in the middle of it. I want something better for them… and for you, my love." Ziva lifted her head to look at him. The love that was shining in the man's eyes took her breath away and she instantly knew what she wanted… what she needed. She needed that unconditional love that Anwar was offering her and which she had never got from her father. She gave him a loving smile then kissed him._

"_You know that I would follow you to the end of the world, my love." With that she lay back on Anwar's chest and sighed. "You are right. I just wish that there would be another way."_

"_Me, too, Ziva. Me, too. But at this moment there is only one thing that matters. Us. Our little family. And I will do anything just to know that you are safe. Both of you." He held her even closer and closed his eyes with a heavy sigh. He was hoping against hope that nothing would happen to the woman in his arms and their baby. He knew that Eli David's arms could reach very far but he also knew that he was ready to do anything that needed to be done just to ensure the safety of his family._

"_I love you, Anwar." He smiles when he heard the sleepy voice._

_"I love you, too, Ziva. Both of you."_

_They lay in silence for a little while. And though Ziva wasn't comforted completely, at that moment she felt content. She just wished that her father would understand…_

_"Sing for me?" She asked Anwar almost in a whisper._

_As the man began to sing an Arabic lullaby, the one that always made Ziva feel safe and loved, she could feel her eyelids getting heavier and a peace sleep taking over her._

_

* * *

_

The squeaking of the wooden stairs drew his attention to the entrance of the basement and he smiled slightly when he recognized the person who was now making her way down the stairs. She was taking her time getting down and for Gibbs she almost seemed hesitant.

He straightened on his chair but did not get up.

When Ziva finally stepped down from the last stair, she stopped and, after running her eyes around the basement and acknowledging Gibbs' presence, she sat down on the stairs. For several long minutes there was complete silence in the room and when finally it was broken, it was Gibbs standing up, grabbing his mug and an empty jar and pouring a generous amount of bourbon into each of them. Without a word he walked up to Ziva and sat down next to her offering her his mug. Ziva accepted it and without any further ado, she drank the liquid at one shot.

Gibbs drowned it, too, then they continued sitting in silence.

"I need you." Ziva spoke up finally without looking at her partner and Gibbs found the steadiness of her voice in sharp contrast with her previously uncertain movements. Looking at her, he waited for her to continue.

"I think that I am not telling you anything new if I admit that I am in love with you." She still was occupied studying the empty mug in her hands but she could see the slight nod that Gibbs gave her. So she continued after a deep sigh. "And I am fairly certain that you have feelings for me, too." Gibbs nodded again unsure of where the conversation was going.

After Gibbs confirmation, she swallowed trying to chase away the tears which were threatening to fall.

"In the last few days I was thinking very hard about this… about us. And I…" She finally looked into the man's eyes which were regarding her with an intense gaze. "I really want this, Gibbs. I really do..." Her words stopped when she saw the sparkle in his blue eyes and her heart broke when she finally finished her sentence. "…but I cannot."

Gibbs slowly nodded in acceptance without any emotion visible on his face then moved to stand up and pour himself another drink. He was stopped, though, by Ziva's fingers curling around his wrist.

"Do not be angry with me, Gibbs." Gone was the steadiness and determination from her voice. It sounded almost pleading while she was still struggling with her tears. Gibbs slowly stepped back towards her, bent down and gently kissed her forehead. That was when Ziva completely lost it and began sobbing with everything she had. Gibbs was sitting next to her in an instant and took the crying woman into his arms. He held her until her sobs subsided then, when finally she stopped crying, he pulled away to look at her.

"Are you done acting like a tragic hero in one of Dinozzo's movies?" He asked in a tone that was usually reserved for Tony when he was doing something stupid. Ziva nodded feeling embarrassed by letting herself break down just like that. "Good." Gibbs acknowledged smirking satisfied. "Then we can talk like two sensible people."

"Gibbs…"

"No." He interrupted her. "You've already had your turn. Now I'm the one who's doing the talking." Ziva nodded wordlessly letting him to continue but Gibbs didn't do so for a while. They just sat there looking in front of themselves. But then Gibbs spoke up again.

"I need you, Ziva." He repeated her previous words in a solemn tone and, though, Ziva's head shot up to look at him, he continued staring in front of himself. He'd never been good at that stuff but he knew that now he had to share his feelings because otherwise he'd lose Ziva forever. So he gathered his thoughts and tried to put his feelings into words, however pathetic they must sound. "Ever since I lost Shannon and Kelly, I am a lonely man. I felt lonely with my ex-wives… hell, I even felt lonely with Jenny… but that just suited me fine…" He shrugged. "I guess I've always been afraid of losing my family if I have let somebody take their place… but I've made some thinking on my part, too, you know…" Here he looked at Ziva at last and gave her a little smile. "... and I had to realize that nobody can take their place, no matter what… but I also had to realize that it doesn't mean that there is no place for somebody else in my life…" He reached out and took Ziva's hand into his own. Ziva was so stunned by his raw honesty that she couldn't even react. She just stared at him. "Ziva, I need you in my life… I don't want to be lonely anymore… and I know that you don't want to be, either. I know that you are fighting your own demons, and believe me, I'm still fighting mines, but you know what? We can do it together. You know, as a team." He gave a gentle squeeze to her hand. "I'm sure that there will always be things that won't be talked about but that's just it, Ziva. Things from the past. Maybe it's time for both of us to look into the future. We have to live on in spite of what had happened before. I'm ready to move on. So here I am… I'm in love with you and believe me if I say that I'd never judge you for anything in your past… do not let it hold you back…"

He was still holding her hand as he waited patiently for an answer. The minutes seemed to be dragging on at a snail's pace as the silence in the basement became deafening.

"Marry me?" Her voice was hardly audible but the words were delivered with such firmness that didn't leave any room for doubt. But Gibbs found himself so surprised that he couldn't help asking back.

"What?"

"You heard me right, Gibbs." She confirmed what he had already known.

"Are you completely sure? My track record isn't the most promising in this area."

"Oh, believe, I would see to it that there would be no more Mrs. Gibbs. Besides, I am not a redhead…" They both chuckled at that but then Ziva's expression turned serious. "You told me you want me… that you accept what I am or what I was… I believe you, Gibbs. But I need… well, to be honest with you, I have not got the faintest idea what I need… maybe the whole world to know what you had promised me… maybe that would make it feel real… that would feel like something that will not disappear from one day to the other… yes… that is what I need… constancy and security… Would you give it to me, Gibbs?"

Ziva was looking into Gibbs' eyes waiting for an answer. Hoping… She knew that probably she was demanding too much from him but she couldn't do it in another way.

One of Gibbs' hands left hers and went to cup her face. He slowly pulled her closer and put a gentle kiss on her temple letting his lips linger there after it.

"Ziva?" He whispered into her hair. "Would you marry me?"

A huge smile appeared on Ziva's lips which lit up her whole face as she looked at the man she loved so much.

"Yes, Jethro, I will marry you." Her smile was mirrored on Gibbs' face as he pulled her into their fist kiss to seal their agreement.

When they pulled apart Gibbs looked at her with glinting eyes.

"Have you really thought that I would let you walk out that door just like that?" His voice was incredulous. Ziva could only giggle as an answer and thank God that he didn't.

**TBC**

_A long chapter… I hope you liked it!_

_Thanks for reading!_


	5. Living On

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

_Well, I hope it's not very OOC. I tried... And please tell me if the 'boat' part doesn't make any sense, I'll try to change that then. Thanks!_

Chapter 5: Living On

Ziva became an American citizen. It just became official that morning and the team, more precisely Abby, decided that the occasion was calling for celebration. So, as many times before in the last months, Ziva stepped into the little bar, which had become the team's 'usual place'. She made a quick search of the place more out of habit than anything else then nodded to the bartender with a smile. By that time Gibbs had caught up with her and together they made their way to their usual table.

"Oh, lookie who's here!" Tony exclaimed with a huge grin on his face as he saw the couple approaching. "My favorite kickass couple. Cheers!" With that he drowned the rest of his beer. "It's good that you arrived, Ziva, because Timmy and I just couldn't agree on what the 12th Amendment is about. Can you he… hey!" Tony cried as Ziva pinched him in the shoulder and pushed him to make room for herself and Gibbs. Ziva settled down by the table with a satisfied smirk while her friend was nursing his hurting arm sulking. Gibbs and McGee just smirked.

"Don't even pay attention to him, Ziva." McGee told her as he began to stand up to go to the bar and help Abby get the drinks. "He was the first one to arrive here and that was definitely not his first beer. What are you two drinking? The first round is on me." At that Tony's eyes lit up. "Their first round, Tony, not yours. You're at your what? Fourth? Fifth?"

"Oh, come on, Timmy? Can't we start over? You know, from square one? Everybody with equal opportunities? After all that's what the American Dream is all about, isn't it Miss America?"

Ziva laughed heartily at her friend's argumentation.

"I think, Tony, that boat has already sailed, yes?" Tony blinked at her blankly while McGee left – after receiving a 'Beer would be good, thanks, McGee' from Gibbs – shaking his head and Gibbs actually laughed out aloud.

"What the hell has a boat got to do with anything?" Tony asked confused then as if understanding dawned on him, he smiled at Gibbs. "Ah… I see… You've got your newest boat out of the basement, haven't you, Boss? And Ziva knows how you did it." Now Ziva looked quizzical and turned to her fiancé with furrowed brows.

"But you did not have any boat in your basement." She stated.

"No, I didn't. And it's a ship, Ziver. Not a boat."

"You're building a ship now, Boss?" Tony's voice was full of awe while Ziva felt utterly lost. _A ship?_

Gibbs opened his mouth as if wanting to say something but he quickly closed it. At this point he was quite sure that if he said just a word more, it would surely lead to the total breakdown of communication and, although he found it fairly amusing at some level, he wasn't sure that he could tolerate it much longer.

Fortunately he was saved by Abby and McGee who returned from the bar with Palmer in tow. The little commission stopped short, though, when they saw the expressions on their friends' faces.

"Um… Guys?" Abby began curiously. "What did we miss?"

"Ziva knows how Gibbs gets his boats out of the basement and Boss-man here is building a ship now. Isn't it cool?" Tony was all enthusiasm. The others, stuck with the 'boat and basement' part, turned towards a still baffled Ziva hoping to get an answer to an age-old mystery.

"But you did not have any boat in the basement." Ziva repeated her previous statement just a bit more forcefully. "And what is this crap about a ship?" Gibbs quickly opted for changing the subject so he reached for the beers Abby was holding and offered one to Ziva.

"Thanks, Abs." He said while the Goth made room for herself next to her favorite silver-haired fox. Gibbs just scooted over rolling his eyes as there was not much place remained on their side of the table and Tony didn't seem willing to move any bit from his position.

"So, Ziva…" Abby turned to her friend excited. "About that boat…"

"What boat?" The Israeli woman was really beginning to think that everybody had lost their minds.

"Abs…" Gibbs turned to the young woman. "There's been no boat in my basement since the Kelly."

"See. There is no boat in his basement." Now she was satisfied. She wasn't the insane after all.

"But Tony said…"

"Are you serious, Abby?" Ziva asked her friend in disbelief. "Tony is saying a lot of things even when he is sober… Now look at him."

"That's true." Abby conceded with a serious nod after glancing at the other agent then she changed the subject. "So when is the big day? Now that Ziva's got her naturalized citizen status there's nothing in the way." Gibbs looked at his fiancée next to him who was beaming at him. They hadn't really got the time to talk about it yet but one thing was for sure. "As soon as possible." They replied in unison.

"Ah… Aren't you two cute?" Abby cooed to her friends and the look on Gibbs' face made Ziva laugh out while she buried her face into the man's shoulder. "We have to drink to that." Abby said enthusiastically and turned to the others. "Alright, guy. Shut up for a second. Let's say a toast to the sweetest couple I've ever known."

"At least she left out the cute part." Gibbs whispered to Ziva.

"Hey…" Tony cried out. He had got his own beer after all. "But Ducky isn't here yet!"

"Don't worry about it, Tony. We'll say another one when he arrives."

"Oh, in that case, go ahead!"

"Thanks, Tony. So… First of all, to you, Ziva. Welcome in the beautiful land of America. And of course, to both of you. I still can't believe that you are getting married, Gibbs."

"Again." Tony chimed in then grimaced when McGee slapped him in the head.

"We are so happy for you, guys." Abby continued ignoring Tony. "It's like… I don't know… like Dad's finally found the right woman and the family can now live happily ever after."

"I drink to that!" Palmer raised his beer smiling. "Cheers!"

"Cheers!" Cried everybody and as Gibbs leant back in his seat he looked around proudly at his 'family'. In a way all of them were his children and he wouldn't change that for the world.

"Argh…" Tony frowned as he seemed to have realized something. Yet again… "Abs, if you are right and Gibbs is Dad, it means that Ziva is… Mom?" He continued frowning deep in thoughts while the others grinned at Ziva who visibly paled.

"No way…" She cried out in protest.

"It's just wrong." Tony lamented to himself while Ziva turned to Gibbs with a serious expression.

"If Tony were your child, I would sure run for the hills. No offence, Gibbs."

"Don't even think about it, Ziva. You're stuck with me and the kids." Gibbs' eyes were twinkling with humor as he pulled Ziva closer to him and put his other arms over Abby's shoulder then he planted a kiss on each of their heads. Everybody around the table erupted into a heartfelt laughter. Tony just kept frowning.

"Alright, I can live with that. But just one question, Honey…" Ziva told Gibbs giving him a theatrical sweet smile. "Cannot we give Tony up for adoption?" She asked innocently and batted her eyelashes for good measure.

While, once again, everybody laughed out, Tony looked genuinely hurt so Ziva scooted closer to him and hugged him.

"Oh, come on, Tony. You know that I love you." She told him as if speaking to a child. A wicked grin appeared on the man's face.

"I love you, too… Mom." Ziva instantly straightened up and looked at him with narrowed eyes.

"Call me that once again…" She leant closer to him. "… and I break your fingers… one by one."

"You know, Ziva, I've always known that there is a hidden maternal side of you." McGee stated with a serious face which made everybody laugh… except for Tony.

Later that night the team became considerably quieter. Ducky had also arrived at some point but Abby and McGee got lost somewhere at another.

Ziva's chin was resting on her crossed arms which were lying on the table while she sleepily observed as Tony was entertaining a very enthusiastic looking Palmer on the other side of the table. Occasionally she sighed contently as Gibbs was unconsciously stroking her back while he talked quietly with Ducky. She had no idea what the two men next to her were talking about because her attention was focused on the other two in front of her. More precisely, on Tony. He seemed to be deep in some kind of philosophical explanation while Palmer was listening completely enjoying the fact that the agent was paying any kind of attention to him.

"I am worried about Tony." She spoke up out of the blue and for several seconds the two older men just looked at her.

"As we all are, my dear." Ducky answered finally.

"He is unhappy." Ziva stated while her eyes stayed focused on her friend. "He tries to hide it but I know he is."

"That's very true, Ziva. And I think that the reason is that our Anthony feels lonely."

"Lonely?" Ziva straightened up and looked at the old ME. "He is hardly ever alone."

"It's not what Ducky meant, Ziver."

"Yes, of course not."

"If you allow me to express my opinion, I think that Antony is ready to settle down. He has matured a lot in the last years." Ziva couldn't help the snort that escaped her mouth.

"Ducky's right, Ziver. It might not seem so but he's a responsible man."

"I know that Jethro." Ziva became serious once again. "It is just… If he wants to settle down, why does he seem to be so reluctant to do so at the same time?"

"It's not that easy. He's been in love before."

"Yes, I know. Jeanne." Ziva's tone became bitter with the mentioning of the name of that woman who had caused so much tension between the partners.

"And Kate." Gibbs supplied quietly which was accompanied by a little sad nod from Ducky.

"Kate Todd?"

"Yes. He was in love with her and I think he had just begun to realize that himself when Kate died." He still felt guilty about them, especially now that he was about to marry one of his team members. At that time he was so insistent on his Rule 12 that he hadn't even realized what it could mean for Kate and Tony. He doubted, though, that they were anywhere near breaking the rule. Still, Rule 12 was hovering above them… Gibbs had a suspicion that, if not completely, but his engagement with Ziva was the reason why Tony had been acting strange lately. He made a mental note to have a talk with his younger agent…

"Losing Caitlin meant a great setback for Anthony." Ducky added. "Then came that young lady…" Ziva nodded solemnly in understanding.

"God, that whole business was screwed up from the beginning." Gibbs said then took a swing from his beer. "Jenny should have known better…" He added and pulled Ziva closer to him, kissing her head.

"Tony should have known better, too." She added silently hoping for a nice girl to come around and snap Tony out of that dark place where he seemed to be at that moment.

* * *

_Ziva was sitting by the window in her room staring at the busy little street in Old Jaffa. It was late in the afternoon and the people had just begun to appear on the street after a long and hot summer day. Children were running up and down in little groups happy to be out of the confines of their homes feeling free like a bird. Adults were running errands which could be delayed till this late hour and they were merrily chatting when they bumped into a familiar face. The occasional melodic cry of a salesman came up from down the street accompanied by the squeaking of his old cart as he passed along the street. In the distance from the main road the familiar melody of the car horns could be heard._

_But Ziva David didn't see or hear any of it. Just as she didn't hear her door open and Ari enter the room._

_The man took a couple of tentative steps into the room but then stopped. He hadn't seen his sister for a few months and now he was afraid of facing her. He was afraid of her blaming him for what had happened. He knew that he was blaming himself._

_He couldn't dwell on the subject for long, though, because Ziva had sensed his presence and turned towards him._

"_What have I done, Ari?" Her voice was hardly above a whisper. "I have killed my daughter."_

"_No, Princess." Ari was by her side in an instant taking her into his arms. "No. You have done nothing like that, you hear me?"_

"_I should have never left her." She whispered into his shoulder. "I thought that it was safe… that if Father did not know about her, she would be safe…"_

"_Zee, you could not have known it, hell, I could not have known it…" There was not a person on Earth, who could have known it. He had planned everything so carefully. He had made a back-up plan. He even knew that their original plan was in danger so he set that back-up plan into motion. Ziva didn't know about it but Hanan, whose care Avigail had been left in, was to leave for America with the baby. Ari had planned everything minute by minute… except the terrorist attack…_

_Ari held Ziva for a little while but quickly he became anxious. He knew that his sister was mourning but at that moment there was no time for that. There were still so many things to do…_

"_Ziva…" Ari spoke gently but didn't get any reaction from the woman who had nestled into his arms as if seeking refuge from the world. "Hey, Princess…" He tried again and smiled at her lovingly when Ziva finally moved to look at him. His smile was short-lived, though, because suddenly he couldn't recognize his little sister in the woman who was looking at him. In her eyes, which only minutes ago were filled with indescribable sadness, now he couldn't make out any emotions. They were empty and his stomach twisted in fear._

"_Ziva, have you spoken to Father?" He asked her in a low voice. He didn't like the idea of it one bit but a meeting between their father and Ziva was unavoidable._

_In the last few months he had been working very hard on severing her ties from Mossad. He had made plans ever since Ziva and Anwar told him that they were having a baby. For him it wasn't a question what his father would do when he found out about the two of them. He had to know that whatever happens, Ziva and the baby would be safe. And his determination just got stronger after what had happened to Anwar._

_He felt the anger rise in him at the thought of his best friend's death. And it wasn't only the fact that his father had him executed on false grounds, but the fact that he had done so by using his own daughter. He couldn't blame Ziva, though, for doing what she had done. He could never do that. She loved her father too much to ever question him. He just hoped that one day she would be able to see the real Eli David. He was aware that ever since Anwar's death, something had changed in Ziva. As if she had begun to question her valuation of her father but it was only a slight change and it had only made Ziva more troubled than anything else._

"_Ziva, have you spoken to him?" He repeated his question with more emphasis when he didn't get any answer. They were so close now. The only thing they needed was her resignation to make things official. Not as if it made things less complicated but at least it would leave a paper trail behind in case Eli David wanted to step outside his official boundaries. Ari's heart ached at the thought that the plan, which had originally begun as a rescue of a family, now included only his sister. "Ziva, everything is ready. You just have to hand in your resignation and everything will be over. You will be free."_

_That was when he saw something change in his sister's eyes because the former emptiness was taken over by something that took his breath away. Now they were filled not only by sadness and pain but with trepidation._

"_Free, Ari?" Her voice was filled with despair. "Free to do what? To marry the man I love? To have his baby without being afraid that something might happen to her? No, Ari. I have nothing to do with freedom."_

"_Do not act like this, Ziva. You cannot give up. Not now."_

"_Not now? Then when? Ari, Anwar is dead. I killed him. And I have just buried our daughter. When should I give up then, I ask you? After you end up dead, too? Because that will happen if Father finds out that you had anything to do with my disappearance. I would not let that happen. I would not be the reason of your death, too."_

"_What are you talking about, Sister?"_

"_I am staying, Ari."_

"_Ziva…"_

"_No." She was dead serious about it. Her stern gaze told everything to Ari that he needed to know. So he nodded resigned. He knew her sister too well to argue with her. She had already made her decision and there was only one thing left for him to do… to look after her… there was nobody else to do that…_

_He softly kissed her head as Ziva buried it back into his shoulder._

* * *

Ziva was lying in bed on her side while her head was propped up on her hand and a book was lying in front of her. She couldn't help the occasional giggles that bubbled up from her as she kept reading.

She was so engrossed in the unfolding of the events of the book that she totally missed the squeaking of the stairs as somebody walked up on them and so did she miss the man entering the room and standing next to the bed. However, she did feel the bed sink under the weigh of the man as he lay down behind her, encircling her waist and burying his face into the crook of her neck.

"Mmm… You're still up." Her husband murmured.

"Yes." Ziva answered but didn't pay too much attention to Gibbs who, by this time, had begun kissing her neck and shoulder. After a little while he got annoyed that the woman in his arms didn't respond to his ministration, so he reached in front of them and, despite the quite loud protest of Ziva, he closed the book to take a look at the title.

"Really, Ziva?" He chuckled after reading the title. And one would have expected McGee to stop writing his novels after that incident a few years back. "It's getting old, don't you think?" He asked her with a mixture of humor and amusement in his voice.

"Not at all, Gibbs." She answered indignantly taking back the book and opening it again. "I need to know what happens in here. I so not want to hear it from Tony. I want to be prepared… Besides, it is just getting… interesting…"

"So, David…" He leant closer to her ear and whispered in a husky tone. "What kind of a case is that that takes your attention away from me?"

As an answer, her hearty laughter shook his body.

"Well, as I can see it at this point, there will not be a very complicated plot." She began to explain. "It very much seems that the only thing they will investigate is the death of Rule 12."

"Oh, really? And why is that?" He chuckled into her neck as he resumed kissing it.

"Well, it seems that McGregor and Amy have been having a secret affair for quite some time…" The man stopped, with his lips on Ziva's shoulder and raised an eyebrow at this. "Actually the guy seems to be pretty ready to take this relationship to the next level." Ziva's voice was quite amused as she gave the account of the book.

"He'd better be." Gibbs, on the other hand, hit a more serious tone. "That girl deserves more than a secret affair."

"Now, Jethro, you sound like as if this Amy were a real person." After Gibbs answered with a noncommittal sound, Ziva giggled totally enjoying the conversation. "But there are more interesting stuffs, too, and I am just at that part where Lisa… you know the young, beautiful and not to mention dangerous Israeli officer…" Ziva deliberately took her time to finish her sentence as a mischievous glint appeared in her eyes. "…well, how shall I put it…" She still wasn't in a hurry but smiled satisfied when she heard Gibbs' sharp intake of breath as she wriggled closer to him practically grinding her hips into his. "…well, she is playing the nasty with her boss."

"Really?" Gibbs pulled her even closer and continued his previous activity on her shoulder. "Isn't… she… way… too young… for him?" He asked in-between kisses.

"You know that older men can be very sexy." She practically purred as she gave more access for his discovering lips. "And… by the way… they… totally have the hots… for each other." She obviously had difficulty with concentrating because the words didn't come as fluently as they used to. But she wanted to finish her line of thoughts. She was really curious about Gibbs' reaction. "I have only… read half… of the book… so far… but you would not… believe what… those two had been… up to… not to mention… where…"

"What?" He asked incredulously as his head snapped up then he reached for the book. He slowly settled on his back with the book in hand. Ziva, too, turned around and snuggled closer to the her husband, giggling at the way how he was trying to find the proper distance to be able to read the text without his glasses. "Let's just see then how Tibbs gets laid… and where…" And with that he began to read the passage while Ziva laughed into his shoulder.

She was waiting patiently for his reaction.

"Well…" Gibbs began after finishing. "That was… well… that was interesting." He concluded at last not being able to find a more suitable word then he turned to his wife with raised eyebrows. "Do you think that McGee saw us when…"

"No." Ziva answered drawing out the word.

"Or when we…"

"Nah…" She shook her head with conviction.

"Then maybe when we…"

"Definitely not." She was quick to answer while her eyes grew wide. "He would not be able to look us in the eye if he had seen that."

"True enough." Gibbs shrugged and put away the book. He would make sure, though, that the next day McGee would get some hard moments about his newest novel. "So… just out of curiosity… what do you think will happen to Amy and her boss?" He asked his wife as he kissed her head.

"Well, they get married, of course, and then live happily ever after." Ziva answered matter-of-factly.

"Sounds good to me."

"Yep. Very good."

**TBC**

_Thank you for reading! Sorry for the mistakes!_


	6. Lost Little Girls

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

_Well, here begins the story which was originally my plan to write… before things had gotten out of hand and five other chapters just appeared from nowhere... oh well..._

_Enjoy!_

Chapter 6: Lost Little Girls

"_Ready to go?" Ari stepped into the little room where Ziva was currently sitting with Avigail in her arms. She was silently singing to the baby in Arabic, the same song Anwar used to sing to her. In spite of everything that had happened, that song could still sooth her and it seemed that Avigail, too. She was quite restless during the whole day as if she could have sensed that something was happening... something that wasn't good at all._

_As the song ended Ziva slowly looked up at her brother._

"_Just a few more minutes. Please..." Ari could clearly hear the distress in her voice. He sighed then stepped to her and sat down next to her._

"_We have to go, Ziva, if we want to get back to Tel Aviv in time."_

"_I know, Ari. I know. But it is so difficult to leave her here."_

"_It is but Hanan and her husband are good people. They will take good care of her." Ari met Hanan in Edinburgh. Her parents had emigrated from Syria back in the 1970s then, after college, she moved into Israel after marrying an Israeli doctor. He was happy that Hanan and his sister had established a good friendship during the months Ziva had spent with the family. And Ari knew that he couldn't have found a better place for Avigail to stay until everything got arranged. "She is beautiful, Ziva. She has Anwar's eyes." Ari stated looking into the girl's still dark blue eyes which would sure turn into deep brown. He felt Ziva tense next to him at the mention of her lover's name. Anwar was still a sore point between the siblings as Ari was convinced that his friend had been innocent. Ziva, on the other hand, was a completely other question. Ari wasn't sure what she could be thinking about the whole thing but he had a suspicion that his sister had her own doubts about the incident and her stubborn insistence on Anwar's guilt was some kind of self-defence on her part. Maybe she wasn't ready to accept the fact that their father had made her choose between him and her lover... and she choose her father... "But she has your nose and mouth."_

"_That she does." Ziva was looking at her daughter lovingly for a little longer then she stood up with a sad sigh. "Let's go." She looked down at her brother with sad eyes._

_Ari also stood up then pulled Ziva and the baby closer to him._

"_Hey, Princess..." He looked into her troubled brown eyes seriously. "Everything will be alright. I promise. I will make whatever it takes to make sure of that. Alright?"_

_Ziva smiled at him gratefully then rose on her tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek. "Thank you." She whispered._

_In the dirty street of the little village Ziva carefully handed Avigail to Hanan kissing her child one more time. "Take care, my darling." She whispered with teary eyes then kissed Hanan as well making her promise that she would take good care of her daughter. Slowly she turned to make her way to the awaiting car but she didn't get in. She stopped by the door and reached for her backpack. She opened it and after a short search, she took out something. Ari's questioning look became smiling as he realized what her sister had been looking for. In the hands of his sister there were those two little purple gorillas that he had given her all those years ago. With the years their ridiculously lively purple colour had faded somewhat but for him, they still looked quite funny. But Ziva cherished them. He watched as she separated the two pieces with skilled fingers then grabbed the smaller one and made her way back to Hanan._

_Ziva carefully placed the toy between her daughter's small searching fingers and smiled when the baby grabbed it. "Here, my beautiful girl." Ziva kissed her once more then practically ran back to the car letting her tears fall. She got in and the car began to move._

"_It is just for a few weeks, Princess. Do not worry." Ari smiled at her sister reassuringly._

_As Ziva took one last worried look at her baby from the moving car gripping the other purple gorilla in her hands, little did she know that those few weeks would turn into months... and years..._

_

* * *

_

"Morning, Boss." McGee looked up from the computer screen to greet Gibbs as he walked into the bull pen, coffee in hand.

"Hey, Boss!" Tony greeted Gibbs, too, then frowned. Something was missing... or more precisely, someone. "Hmm… Boss? Where did you leave Mrs. Boss?" Tony asked his mischievous grin in place.

"Don't worry, Dinozzo. She's right behind me." Gibbs said smirking as he took the seat behind his desk. "She just has to settle a minor disagreement with a man in the parking lot."

The two younger agents frowned but it was Tony, who spoke up.

"What happened?" Tony inquired eagerly at which Gibbs looked at him. Tony gulped, more from habit than anything else. "If… I may… ask. Boss."

Gibbs just smiled to himself.

"Well, according to Ziva, the idiot hadn't checked his rear-view mirror properly."

"Did he bump into you?" This time McGee was the quicker to speak.

"I'd rather say that Ziva bumped into him… but I'm sure that they can resolve the disagreement."

"And you left Ziva there? Alone?"

"She is more than capable of looking after herself, Dinozzo."

"Well, it's not her I'm worried about, Boss."

In that moment the elevator dinged and Ziva stepped out of it. The two younger agents unbelievably quickly found something to occupy themselves with and desperately tried not to attract the presumably very pissed off Ziva's attention. Gibbs, on the other hand, regarded Ziva with a calm look.

"Good morning, everybody! Is it not a beautiful morning?" McGee and Tony froze as they heard Ziva's cheerful voice then they looked up at her. Gibbs just smirked. She gave all of them a sweet smile while Tony suspiciously regarded her.

"Should we call Ducky, Ziva?" He asked with narrowed eyes.

"That would not be necessary, Tony."

"Ziva?" Gibbs asked with the slightest of worry in his voice.

"Do not worry, Gibbs. I did not even touch him." At that McGee sighed with relief while Gibbs posture relaxed a little bit.

"I'm disappointed, Ziva. Did not even push him?" Tony asked and Ziva shook her head. "Not even a little?" Tony almost whined, but again, she just shook her head. "Damn, and I thought something interesting would happen today."

"Well, Dinozzo, nothing interesting so you can turn your full attention back to writing up your report."

"Yes, Boss."

"Hey, Tony." Ziva whispered trying to get Tony's attention but not really caring that the others heard her, too. "If it makes you feel better, I can assure you that he will not sit behind the wheel again for a very long time." She gave him a playful wink as Tony's face lit up then turned back to her work.

Gibbs just shook his head with a barely visible smile.

They were working in silence for a while when Gibbs' phone began to ring.

"Gear up!" He instructed his team after hanging up. He quickly grabbed his gun and badge from the drawer and on his way to the elevator he threw the truck key to Tony. "We have a dead Marine in Baltimore." He smirked as he saw his wife's indignant expression.

"You didn't think that you'd drive after your little incident this morning, did you, David?"

"It was not my fault." She shouted after his retreating form indignantly and she had to suppress her urge to smack Dinozzo in the face when he walked out with a mocking grin on his face. Then, after grabbing her bag, she quickly left for the elevator, too, and jumped in as the doors began to close.

* * *

"Oh man!" Tony exclaimed with a disgusted grimace for the up tenth time since the team arrived at the crime scene. "Somebody is seriously living at this garbage heap?"

"Cut it off, Tony, will you?" McGee was quickly getting fed up with his colleague's whining. At a certain level he could totally understand him as the house was in a serious need of cleaning but they wasn't there to live in it, they had work to do…

"Cut it off? Have you seen the bathroom? I wouldn't let my dog in there."

"Tony, you don't have a dog."

"That's not the point, McGee." McGee rolled his eyes as he made his way up the squeaky stairs leaving Tony to finish collecting evidence downstairs.

"We are good to go, Anthony." Ducky and Palmer emerged from the living room with the body of the late Major Patrick Wilson.

"Alright, Ducky. Gibbs's still out there somewhere." He told the doctor absentmindedly as he stood in the door to the kitchen gathering his strength to enter. "And how I wish that I were there, too." He frowned as he took a look into the messy and not to mention smelly room.

On their way out of the house the two MEs bumped into Gibbs.

"Jethro, I've just told our Anthony that we are ready to go. That's it if you don't need anything else."

"It's alright, Duck." Gibbs patted the older man on the shoulder as he went on. "We are almost finished here, too." With that the agent stepped into the kitchen. "Dinozzo, what have you got?"

"A whole load of crap, Boss."

"Well, I hope that you've got more than that."

"Of course, Boss…" Tony answered chastised. "Well with the amount of evidence we've collected, Abby will sure have a field day… and I also found the murder weapon. It was a completely and utterly disgus…"

"Hey, Gibbs." Ziva interrupted Tony as she stormed into the room. "We are missing a girl." She stated as the two man turned towards her. "Major Wilson and his wife are the foster parents of five children. One of them is outside with Mrs. Wilson, three children are in school at the moment but I could not locate the fifth child. She should be in school, too, but she is not."

"Great. A missing child." And Tony thought that the day couldn't get any worse. Both Gibbs and Ziva gave Tony a pointed look and he frowned at them. "You know it's quite unnerving when both of you are giving me the Gibbs look."

Gibbs looked amused at that but Ziva just rolled her eyes and turned back to the other man.

"Mrs. Wilson told me that there was a man who had been giving them a hard time lately. The court withdrew his visitation rights but he insisted on seeing his daughter. It is very much possible that he is the one who killed the Major."

"Wow, Sherlock Holmes here is saying something, Boss." Tony laughed but Gibbs' raised eyebrow quickly shut him up. "Sorry, Boss."

"Well, Tony, as I said it is likely that he killed the Major but the missing girl is not his daughter. His daughter is with Mrs. Wilson at the moment." Ziva finished.

"Tony go and…" Gibbs turned to his senior agent.

"…and put on an amber alert. On it, Boss." Within seconds Tony was by the kitchen door but he bumped into McGee there.

"Uhm, Boss… I think it won't be necessary. I've found her."

The team quickly followed McGee up the stairs and into a little dirty room which was packed with three beds.

"It must be the girls' room." Tony was just about to make a comment about Ziva stating the obvious once again but he was cut short by the younger agent's elbow connecting with his ribs.

"Ouch, Ziva! You really had to do that?"

"Yes." Tony just looked at her frowning. Ziva stepped closer to him with a dangerous look in her eyes that made the other agent step back slightly. "You know, Tony, I was this close to inflicting some serious injuries on the man who had been stupid enough to bump into me this morning. Now my palms are really itching..." Tony visibly gulped but suddenly a hand connected with his head.

"Ouch!" He said again while his hand involuntarily went up to stroke the burning area.

"Are you two done?" Gibbs asked his two agents with an annoyed look.

Ziva nodded going back to serious in an instant then started walking around the room.

"And why did she get the gentler one?" Tony whined referring to the fact that the Israeli woman had indeed got a visibly gentler slap. "She was the one who elbowed me."

Ziva turned back to him with an all too sweet smile on her face.

"That is, Tony, what you call the perks of sleeping with the boss, yes?"

"Too much information there, thank you, Ziva." Tony frowned. "I prefer imagining you playing cards or someth… argh…" It seemed that Tony was intent on breaking his personal record of the number of head-slaps per day. "…on second thought, I rather not image anything and now I'm going back to work, Boss."

"That's much better, Dinozzo." Gibbs agreed then turned to McGee. "Where is the girl, McGee."

"She is hiding in the wardrobe, Boss. I tried to coax her out but she wouldn't move."

"Do you think she saw something?" Ziva posed the question.

"Well, there is only one way to find it out. What's her name, Ziva?"

"Uhm… Abigail" Gibbs nodded then went and squatted down by the wardrobe. The team waited patiently for quite some time but Gibbs didn't succeeded in getting the little girl out from her hiding place. Finally he stood up and went back to the others. Tony quickly assumed the task to charm the little girl out of the wardrobe but he also had to return defeated. That was when every head turned towards the only woman in the room. Ziva put up her hands in protest.

"Oh no… I do not think that it is a good idea."

"Ziver…"

"What? McGee and Tony could not get her out, hell, you could not get her out. What could I possibly do?"

"Just give it a try! Please."

Ziva sighed defeated then stepped to the wardrobe. She squatted down to peek into it and suddenly she was met by two large dark brown eyes and a mess of dark brown curls. Her breath was caught in her throat and for a moment she couldn't move but then she jumped onto her feet and stepped back from the wardrobe as if she had seen a ghost.

"Ziver…" Gibbs stepped next to her concerned. "You alright?"

The female agent blinked once or twice then looked at the man next to her. She felt slightly dizzy but she nodded. "Sure?"

"Of course, I just…" She was looking for the words but the truth was that she didn't really know for which words. "I'll go, talk to her." With that she returned to the wardrobe and not long after that, at her team mates' great amazement, she returned to them with a six-year-old in her arms.

"Hey, guys…" She called to them smiling. "Meet Abby from the wardrobe." The little girl was clinging to the Israeli woman and her face was buried into her neck so her long curly hair hid all of her face. "We have a problem, though." Ziva continued. "She is not speaking. She must be in some kind of shock."

"Alright..." Gibbs began collecting his thoughts. "Until she begins to speak, we have to assume that she saw something. She's coming with us. Ziva, take her to Ducky and have him take a look at her." Ziva nodded and Gibbs turned to Tony. "Dinozzo, you are with the other girl. What's her name?"

"Lora Carpino" Ziva supplied.

"Lora. She's coming with us, too. McGee, find her father and find out everything about him. Dinozzo, you make a background search on the Wilsons. Ziva will help you after she finished with Ducky."

"But, Boss. How am I supposed to look after the girl and do my job?" Gibbs turned to Tony with a clearly annoyed look.

"You multitask, Dinozzo."

"Yeah, of course, I'll do that."

* * *

Ziva was sitting by Gibbs' desk watching Abigail drawing by her desk. That little girl stirred up feelings in her, feelings she wasn't altogether comfortable with. On the one hand, she wanted to be close to her... to comfort her... to help her through that ordeal that she was experiencing. But on the other hand, she didn't want to have anything to do with her. She wished that Gibbs hadn't placed her in her care. She reminded her so much of what she couldn't have.

She knew, however, that it was neither the place, nor the time to dwell on her losses. Abigail seemed to take a special liking to her. She trusted Ziva enough to leave her sanctuary. She felt safe with Ziva and she didn't have the heart to deprive the little girl of that feeling. After all she knew all too well how it felt living without it.

Ziva slowly stood up and walked to her desk.

"Hey, Abby." She began gently and the girl looked up at her. "What are you doing?" She winced at the stupidity of her question but she really felt awkward. This whole small talk thing wasn't her cup of tea at all. Abby didn't answer just turned back and continued drawing. Ziva sighed defeated. How could someone pick up a conversation with a girl who wasn't willing to speak? "Can I take a look?" She asked and smiled when Abby removed her arms which were hiding the picture from her. "It is very nice, Abby. You are very talented. Do you like drawing?" Ziva winced again. Obviously she liked drawing. Abby nodded with a small smile. "Do you mind if I join you?" As the girl shook her head, her brown curls danced happily around her face.

Ziva stepped closer to her chair and picked up the girl easily then settled down and put Abby in her lap. She was surprisingly small to her age and Ziva couldn't help wonder how the Wilsons treated her.

"Alright, let's see..." She squeezed the little girl playfully then grabbed a pencil and both of them set to work in companionable silence.

It was late in the afternoon when Gibbs came down from the Director's office. Ziva was still drawing with Abby, who occasionally giggled at whatever the Israeli woman was whispering into her ear. Gibbs smiled at the sight of them then turned his attention to McGee, who had returned from Abby's lab and now looked quite busy typing away on his keyboard. Of course, it didn't mean anything, Gibbs thought. That boy could look very busy doing nothing at all... or he was just chatting with Abby, which he caught him to do quite often.

"Where is Dinozzo?" Gibbs asked finally stopping by his desk.

"I think he's still chasing after Lora." McGee informed Gibbs looking up from his computer screen and at that moment they could see the two-year-old running past them giggling happily with Tony just right after her. The two men looked after their colleague with amused glances while Ziva just laughed out and little Abby giggled with her.

"Well, I guess this is a whole new concept of Tony chasing after a girl." Ziva stated smiling.

"That's right, Ziva. That's very right." McGee conceded.

"Hey!" Gibbs shouted after his senior agent. "Dinozzo!" But Lora had already made her way around the squad room and she was running in the direction of the team leader. Gibbs stepped into her way and the little girl stopped abruptly just before she could have bumped into the man's legs. Big blue eyes were taking in the older man from his shoes until they reached a pair of stern blue eyes. For a moment there was deadly silence among the team, even Tony stopped panting as he stood a couple of steps behind Lora. But then a smile appeared on Gibbs' face as he leant down to scoop up the little girl.

"So Lora, are you giving a hard time to Agent Dinozzo?" He asked the little girl and smiled when she nodded enthusiastically. "Good." Gibbs tousled her light brown hair with a satisfied smirk. He could hear Ziva and McGee chuckle.

"I hope, Dinozzo, that you managed to exhaust her." He looked at his agent.

"I don't think that it's possible, Boss." Tony answered still panting.

"That's too bad for you." Gibbs smirked while Tony looked at him dreading what he was sure would come next. "You are taking her home." He put the girl down then patted her back. "Alright, Lora. Don't wear him out too much." With that the little girl ran to Tony giggling happily and stretched out her arms for the man to pick her up. Tony lifted the girl with a scared frown which the others found quite amusing.

"Ziver…" Gibbs turned to his wife. "Abby's staying with us." Ziva nodded and smiled down at the girl in her lap. "Alright, people. Let's go home. It was a long day."

**TBC**

_Thanks for reading!_


	7. Disturbed

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

Chapter 7: Disturbed

_It is dark and although it looks cold, she doesn't feel anything. She can see the trees bending in the wind and she can see the rapidly falling raindrops but she cannot feel them. However, she can feel the weigh in her arms and she looks down. There is her baby girl sleeping in her arms and she smiles at her. As she walks on, she begins to sing an old children song. For a fleeting moment she finds it strange that the words of the song leave her lips in Arabic._

_She stops when she reaches an open grave and this is the first time that she realizes that she is in a cemetery. Then she is not alone anymore. Her father is standing next to her and she instinctively holds her baby closer. But it doesn't matter after all because when her father reaches for her, she cannot do anything to prevent him from taking her still sleeping daughter from her. She is crying as she watches her father put the baby into the grave but she cannot move._

_Then her father disappears but she can see two other silhouettes standing behind the headstone of the grave. By now, she can barely see from behind her tears but she knows who they are. She still can't move. She wants to talk to them but the sobs that are shaking her body are too strong and she can't utter a single word. She wants to scream out, she wants to tell them that she is sorry… that she loves them… but she can't do either of them. And the men are standing there watching her accusingly._

_Her surrounding begins to blur and she finds herself standing in a dark building with a gun in her hand. Her father is back. He is standing behind her and though she cannot understand his words, she knows what he wants her to do. So she raises her gun… her heart beats fast in her chest… but she is no longer in that building. She is in a basement, which she finds familiar and oddly comforting. But the man standing in it seems somewhat out of place. She knows that the man doesn't belong there. He isn't a stranger, though. She knows him. She is in love with him._

_She smiles happily when she sees the joy in his eyes… those familiar deep brown eyes. He is talking to her but she cannot make out the words. And he is holding a baby. Her baby. Their baby. She smiles at them but then she realizes that she is still holding the gun. Suddenly she feels scared… so scared. Her arm automatically reaches out so her gun is aimed directly at the man's head. She doesn't want to do this… she doesn't want to pull the trigger… she is sobbing again… then there is a gunshot… she closes her eyes and when she opens them again and looks at the man who she has just shot, she finds him gone… but lying on the dusty ground with a hole in the middle of his head there is her brother…_

_Then she feels somebody touching her shoulder and she spins around… and she finds herself face to face with her father…_

Ziva shot up in bed. For a moment she felt disorientated but as the memories of her dream came back to her, she broke out in heart wrenching sobs. In the next instant she found herself enveloped in the embrace of two strong arms.

As she was lying in Gibbs arms, clinging to him like a little child, she was repeating three words. Three little words that broke the ex-marine's heart over and over again.

_I am sorry._

He held her until she stopped crying and her breathing evened out, all the while wondering what could have happened. He wasn't unfamiliar with nightmares, although they came less frequently nowadays. But it happened nonetheless. He used to wake up in cold sweat but ever since he could see Ziva lying next to him sleeping peacefully or regarding him with understanding sleepy eyes, it was easier to go back to sleep. Ziva, on the other hand, usually didn't wake up. Gibbs remembered the nights they spend on the phone before their marriage. He always assumed that Ziva had been woken up by one of her nightmares and hadn't been able to go back to sleep. He had to realize, though, that she simply hadn't been able to go to sleep at all. He noticed that Ziva could sleep trough any of her nightmares. Usually he was the one woken up by them when Ziva was tossing in bed next to him. These times he would took her in his arms whispering soothing words to his wife waiting for her to settle. After that both of them would sleep through the night.

But this time it was different... and he was worried…

After going back to sleep, Ziva was woken up once again that night. She didn't open her eyes, though. She waited. Something had disturbed her sleep and she wanted to know what before she would react in any way. That was when she heard it and a fraction of a second later her hand snapped up to her face trapping whatever touched her there between her hand and cheek. Her eyes flew open in alert and she found herself staring into a pair of frightened deep brown eyes.

"Abby?" Ziva whispered in surprise and let go of the small hand she was gripping by her face. The little girl drew back slightly then tears appeared in her eyes. Ziva quickly sat up in bed cursing under her breath. "Abby, I am so sorry. I did not know..." Ziva was lost for words. "What were you doing here?" She asked softly feeling extremely guilty for scaring the girl like that.

They were staring into each others' eyes for a time when Ziva felt the bed shift under her then shortly after that she could feel Gibbs' hand on her shoulder. She took a quick worried glance at her husband who was sitting behind her then turned back to the girl.

"You can't sleep, Abby?" Ziva could hear Gibbs' deep voice and felt relieved when Abby finally reacted. She watched as Abby shook her head with downcast eyes as if anticipating some kind of reprimand for her behaviour and she had to wonder again if the Wilsons were suitable foster parents. Then again she hadn't given her the warmest welcome, either. "Would you like to sleep here with us?" Gibbs asked and Ziva had to smile when Abby's head snapped up and she nodded happily. "Then what are you waiting for, Kiddo? Hop in."

Ziva had to chuckle as Abby climbed over her and settle down completely satisfied between the two adults. Ziva gave an amused look to her husband as she settled back down in bed. Gibbs just smiled at her clearly proud of himself. Well, he didn't have quite a difficult job dealing with the situation, Ziva scoffed to herself, after all he must have gone through it countless time.

As her eyes closed an image of Gibbs as a father filled her mind and she went to sleep with a smile on her lips.

* * *

The next morning the Gibbses and little Abby stepped out together from the elevator. Gibbs went straight to his desk but Ziva stopped short between hers and Tony's.

"I did not realize that we are so early." She stated somewhat confused after noticing that both McGee's and Tony's desk were empty.

"No, it's not early. Not at all." Gibbs told her not bothering to hide his dislike of the situation. "I'll be down with Ducky. You'll be alright with Abby here?"

"Actually, I thought about taking Abby down to… Abby." Gibbs nodded at the girls smiling then turned to leave. "Have fun, Kiddo."

"Alright, little girl." Ziva squeezed Abby's shoulders as the girl looked up at her curiously. "Are you ready to meet the other Abby?" The little girl nodded. "I thought so, too. I have a feeling that you will love her."

Later, when Ziva returned to the squad room, she found only McGee sitting by his desk. Tony was nowhere to be seen.

"You were late, Tim." She said as a greeting as she passed her friend's desk but she didn't get any answer. She stopped and turned around with a raised eyebrow. McGee was staring at the screen in front of him and it was obvious that he was completely zoned out. She stepped behind him and leant down so her face was right besides McGee's. She waited for a little longer but there was no indication that the other agent had noticed her.

"I said you were late, McGee." McGee jumped visibly which Ziva found quite amusing and she stepped back laughing.

"God, Ziva. Did you really have to sneak upon me just like that?"

"Sneak, McGee?" Ziva asked back still laughing. "You would not have noticed a herd of elephants if they had been marching right through the squad room." McGee didn't respond to that. He just rubbed his eyes troubled which made Ziva alert. Her features became serious in an instant. "Is something bothering you?"

"Me? No…" Ziva narrowed her eyes in suspicion then leant closer and, placing each of her hands on the armrests of his chair, trapped McGee in his seat.

"Is something bothering Abby?" Ziva inquired further with narrowed eyes and McGee visibly paled under her scrutinizing gaze.

"Abby? Why would… How could I… Why are you asking me this?" Now he looked remarkably embarrassed and Ziva couldn't help torturing the poor thing a little longer.

"I do not know…" She shrugged. "…maybe because you are the one who is sleeping with her?" She suggested. The look on his face was priceless, Ziva thought. Did he really think that nobody knew about the two of them? "Come on, McGee. Everybody knows about it. You even wrote it down in your book." Ziva stated the obvious and McGee opened his mouth to answer to that but Ziva lifted a finger effectively cutting him off. "Do not say a word. Just answer my first question."

McGee was thinking for a few seconds then answered.

"Well, Ziva. Thank you for your concern but nothing's bothering me." He answered seriously and watched as Ziva furrowed her browns in confusion.

"Alright, I meant my second question." Again, McGee was about to answer but Ziva stopped him. "And do not even think about starting this conversation all over again." She straightened up. "Tell me what is up with Abby." At that McGee sighed heavily and Ziva sat down on the cabinet waiting for the man to speak.

"I don't know." Ziva raised an eyebrow. "I honestly don't know." McGee's tone became defensive. "She's acting all weird recently. Did she tell you something?" He looked at Ziva hoping that his girlfriend had shared her problem with the Israeli woman.

"No." She shook her head and was about to say something when caught sight of Tony exiting the elevator. "Hey, look at that." She nudged McGee, a smile appearing on her face. And this time, as usually when Tony was involved, her smile wasn't mocking or fake, it was almost tender. But it quickly changed and she was ready to tease her friend.

"Hey, Tony." She greeted the agent who looked worse for wear. "Long night?"

Tony just rolled his eyes as he was trying get rid of his stuff and the baby carrier while balancing a sleeping toddler in one arm. Ziva stood up and stepped up to him leaving McGee to observe the events.

"Let me help you." She offered in a low tone then reach for the girl. She took Lora and held her close burying her nose into her hair. "Isn't she an angel?" She asked in a whisper and looked at Tony when he scoffed.

"Oh, yeah, she definitely is… when she is asleep." Ziva chuckled silently and McGee stood up curiously.

"What happened?" He inquired momentarily forgetting about his problems.

"Well, let me see, McNosy…" Tony pretended to think. "…ah yeah, she didn't went to sleep until…" He looked at his watch. "…about three hours ago? She's like a freaking Energizer Bunny." He looked at the peacefully sleeping girl with a frown. "Don't believe that innocent look, she's the devil itself." Ziva and McGee looked at each other with exasperated looks.

"Dinozzzo, McGee…" Gibbs stormed into the squad room with coffee in hand. "… glad you joined us."

"Shhh…" Tony looked genuinely frightened and suddenly everybody looked at him surprised. "Oh, no… nonono…" He looked at Lora almost in panic as the little girl began to stir in Ziva's arms. Ziva hadn't got enough time to process the happenings before Lora began to cry and squirm in her arms. To everybody's surprise, Tony was next to her in an instant and took the screaming toddler from a stunned Ziva.

"Shhh… it's alright, baby… it's alright. I'm here." He cooed to Lora as she was clinging to him. "Hey, there's no need for any of this. Do you remember what I told you about big girls?" At that the little girl lifted up her head from where it was buried into Tony's neck and looked at the man with big blue eyes. With one hand Tony stroked her flushed face and after a few seconds of deep breathing and obvious thinking about keeping crying or stopping, Lora's breathe finally calmed. "That's my girl." Tony gave her a huge smile and tickled her stomach at which happy giggles bubbled up from the little girl.

The team just kept watching the scene in stunned silence. McGee in particular had a distinct feeling that somehow he had ended up in the Mirror Universe. Finally it was Gibbs who returned to the world of reality first. A little smile played on his lips but then he snapped back into boss-mode.

"What about stopping playing house and concentrating on finding our killer instead?" The team looked at Gibbs as if realizing for the first time where they actually was. In an instant they were at their desks looking incredibly busy. Well, Tony was busy with getting Lora sleep again but Gibbs decided that he would let his senior agent be for the time being.

Later that day the team was ready to go and talk to a person who might have some information on Lora's father.

"I'll go and take Lora down to Abby." Tony said as he scooped up the little girl. "Just give me five minutes."

"Oh, no… Don't even think about that." Abby appeared in the squad room with the other girl, who, as soon as she laid eyes on Ziva, ran to the female agent. "No more babysitting." Abby declared. "I'm not the NCIS daycare or Social Service or anything along that line. I have my own problems to tend to, my own work to do. By the way, you brought those girls here, you look after them. I don't want to sound mean because I really like that cute little thing there, she is like a mini Ziva and all and it's totally awesome but I just can't do it now. Sorry." With that she turned on her heels and left. Tony and Ziva just looked after her stunned while Gibbs seemed genuinely confused and McGee was visibly torn between going after her and going with the team.

"Go, talk to her, McGee." Gibbs solved the younger agent's dilemma and he was off to the elevator in an instant. Gibbs turned to the rest of his team with a raised elbow as if not understanding why the hell they were still standing there.

Tony still looked quite stunned so Ziva jumped in.

"I will call Jimmy." As soon as the ME assistant stepped into the squad room, the team was out of the door.

* * *

"Hey." Ziva said in a low tone as she settled down on McGee's desk. It was late and there was silence in the squad room with only a couple of people still at their jobs. "How did it go with Abby?" She asked concerned. Their previous conversation was cut short by Tony's appearance and now she really wanted to finish it.

"Not well." McGee sighed. "She refused to talk and I know better than to push it."

"You have to talk to her, Tim." Ziva insisted. "It will not get better if you ignore it, trust me on that." Now she felt like a hypocrite.

"I know. But for now all I can do is to go home and wait for her to come to me. I'll give it a few days then we'll see." He stood up with a heavy sigh and began gathering his things.

"Alright." Ziva conceded.

"See you tomorrow."

"Yes, see you tomorrow."

McGee was halfway to the elevator when he stopped abruptly and turned back to Ziva.

"Ziva?" She looked at him questioningly. "So you say that everybody knows about us…"

"Yep." Ziva nodded while a thoughtful expression appeared on McGee's face.

"It's alright…" He said finally nodding. "… I think." Ziva laughed up.

"Come on, Tim. It is not as if you should worry about breaking Rule 12."

"You're right, Ziva." McGee concurred then gave her a huge grin. "Boss has already seen to it. I don't even know why we didn't say anything." He shook his head then looked at Ziva gratefully. "Thank you, Ziva."

"You are welcome, Tim." She smiled at him warmly then McGee turned and left.

After Ziva had been left alone in the squad room, she glanced at her watch and decided that it was time to get the others and head home. So she turned and made her way towards the morgue…

When she reached the morgue, she found Ducky, Gibbs and little Abby immersed in a round of cards. A smile appeared on her face when she saw that they were playing with a pack of _Beauty and the Beast_ cards. That was one interesting sight!

Her smile turned sad, though, when the sight of little Abby turned her line of thoughts towards her past.

On those rare occasions when she let her mind wander about things, she usually found herself wondering about her baby girl. All those years when she thought that Avigail was dead, she usually wondered about where they would have ended up if it hadn't been for that terrorist attack which had so cruelly deprived her of knowing her daughter. Then after her father had told her that her daughter hadn't been dead after all and she had a chance to have her back, she began to wonder about how she could look like.

A sad smile appeared on her face as she looked at little Abby who had a serious expression on her face as she tried to beat the men. Ziva always imagined Avigail looking just like Abby did. Funny that the older Abby mentioned that she looked just like a mini Ziva. She was right, Ziva had to realize. From her dark curly hair whose unruly curls framed her face to her little nose and neat lips there was nothing that would have tell her apart from Ziva. Except her eyes. Her deep brown, almost black eyes, which had haunted her dreams for years. Those were Anwar's eyes.

Suddenly she felt the urge to slap herself for her stupidity.

Ever since Somalia and her subsequent return she had worked so hard to leave her pas behind and, however difficult it was, that meant Avigail, too. Ziva knew that she couldn't live on with her ghost hovering above her. So she had buried her into the deepest corner of her memory. She was aware that it wasn't the right thing to do but for her it was the only way to cope.

But when she looked into little Abby's frightened eyes in the Wilsons' house, everything came rushing back and she was left in the tumult of her dark memories with a little girl who could be her own daughter. But it was impossible, she knew. She knew because it still felt like a stab to her heart when Eli David informed her that in reality there had never been a chance for her to see her daughter again. That piece of information made her snap… that piece of information made put a gun to her own father's head… That and the fact that her father, seeing her daughter's heart break right in front of him, added with a stoic expression that losing Avigail had been a great loss for Mossad because that child with an Arab man as a father could have been an invaluable asset of the organization, given that her upbringing was proper…

She closed her eyes for a moment and buried her anger and hatred deep within her. When she opened her eyes again the only thing she could see was the smiling face of Abigail as she seemed to have won the game against the men who were currently laughing with the little girl.

As Gibbs' glance met hers, she could feel her heart warm up. A mere look into her husband's blue eyes and she knew that she was at the right place and right now everything was alright… more or less…

Ziva could feel a smile appear on her face and she spoke up in a light tone which didn't give away her previous dark thoughts.

"Gear up, Gibbs, we are leaving." Gibbs looked back at her and without a word he began to put away the cards.

"Well, Jethro, it's good to see who's wearing the pants from the two of you." Ducky chuckled to himself while Gibbs threw him a dirty look and Ziva seemed utterly confused if her furrowed brows and screwed up nose was something to go by.

"But both of us are wearing pants, Ducky." She voiced her confusion as she looked down herself just to make sure that she was indeed wearing pants. "And why is our choice of cloth so important? I just came down to collect Jethro and Abigail."

"It's just an expression, my dear Ziva." Ducky chuckled good humouredly and even Gibbs smiled at his confused wife. Abigail just watched on intently. "It goes back to the times when men were the sole breadwinners of their families while women were expected to stay at home looking after the house and the children. As only men wore pants at that time and they were the ones providing the survival of the family, it became associated with leadership."

"So… 'Wearing the pants' means being in charge, yes?" Ziva concluded at which Ducky just nodded. Gibbs, though, saw as Ziva's eyes lit up in understanding and he was just about to prevent any comment from his wife but Ziva was faster. "In that case, Ducky, your observation is correct. I am the one wearing the pants." She beamed at her husband smugly.

"Alright." Gibbs stood up somewhat grumpily. "I think we heard enough. Let's go, Kiddo. I hope at least you have some respect for me." Abigail stood up, too, and offered a hand to Gibbs, which he accepted.

Together they joined a still smug Ziva by the door where the Israeli woman sneaked an arm around her husband's waist then turned her head towards the ME.

"Good night, Ducky." She smiled at the old man. "Night, Duck." Gibbs also added as they left the morgue leaving a chuckling man behind them.

As the three of them waited for the elevator, Ziva pulled Gibbs closer to her while her other hand went up to his neck pulling his face down to hers.

"You do know that I love you, yes?"

"Oh, I know it. I love you, too, Ziver." He kissed her gently. "And that's why I let you wear the pants… occasionally."

**TBC**

_I hope you liked it! Thanks for reading!_


	8. Baby Problems

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

_Damn, I should really work on my presentation… but that's for me to worry about… here's the next chapter. Enjoy! And thanks for the reviews, I loved them!_

Chapter 9: Baby Problems

_Ziva was pacing in the room like a caged animal. __She felt trapped. She felt that she would suffocate in any minute and the worst part was that she couldn't escape from her present situation. She couldn't escape from herself… Her feelings were so confusing that she didn't know whether she should break down and cry or laugh until she cries._

_She felt betrayed, disappointed, angry, heartbroken… and scared. What should she do now? How could she make sense of everything that had just happened? She had killed the man she loved… the man whose child she was carrying… But he was a traitor, he leaked information to Hamas… he was the reason of many a good Mossad officers' death._

_She pressed her hands to her closed eyes as she desperately tried to block Anwar's image from her mind. His warm deep brown eyes hadn't left her mind since that day just as she could still feel his blood on her hand that had held the gun._

_After another round around the room she cried out in frustration and, after grabbing the first object she could reach, she hurled it to the wall at the opposite side of the room. The expensive sculpture crashed to the similarly valuable painting on the wall then fell scattered on the floor._

"_Nice throw, Ziva." Eli David entered his office, his face unreadable as always. "You really should show more appreciation towards fine arts, Daughter." A ghost of a smile could be visible on his face. In spite of being annoying most of the time, his daughter's temper could be amusing on occasions._

_Ziva just let out a frustrated puff of air out of her mouth and turned her back to him. Why the hell was she there? What was she expecting from her father__ anyway?_

"_Come here, Ziva." Her father opened his arms for his daughter but Ziva, turning towards him confused, couldn't move. Her father was offering her a hug, the comfort she so desperately needed, but still, his voice felt commanding and it made Ziva froze to the ground. "Come on, Princess… Come here." This time Eli David gave a warm smile to his daughter, a smile Ziva hadn't seen since Tali's death and it felt so unfamiliar directed at her. However, the memories from her early childhood came back and she couldn't help feeling like daddy's little girl once again. With quivering lips Ziva ran to her father and threw herself into his awaiting arms clinging to him as if she didn't want to let go ever again._

_It was the first time in almost twenty years that she cried in the presence of her father._

_When Ziva would later look back on the events that had taken place in that office, she couldn't give a reason why but she felt safe as she clung to her father sobbing like a little child. It felt so good to have her father back that suddenly every doubt concerning Eli David, every accusations and warnings Ari or Anwar had told her seemed to fade away and for a moment there was nothing left in her heart but love towards her father and longing for his care._

_After her tears had dried up, she pulled away a little to look at her father and as Eli David wiped away the remnants of her tears she opened her mouth to tell him everything. She wanted to tell him that she loved Anwar… that he hadn't betrayed only Mossad but her as well… that he had broken her heart and left her with a child to pick up the pieces. She wanted to tell him all of this just because she so wanted to hear him say that everything would be alright._

_But when she opened her mouth, her father spoke up._

"_Now, my child, that man is not worth those tears of yours." Ziva instantly tensed up which made her father smile at her. Although his smile kept its warmth, Ziva couldn't help the knots forming in the pit of her stomach. "I hope you did not think that I did not know about your little fling with that… man. But I understand it. You worked together a lot and sometimes everybody feels lonely… But thank God it is all over. You did the right thing."_

_The right thing, Ziva wondered. She still felt the torment as she stood in that warehouse holding her lover at gunpoint and hearing her father__ telling her to do her duty._

"_We put this whole ordeal behind us and continue working because there is still so much to do. But do not worry, Ziva. From now on I will pay more attention to you." As he said the words his tone was gentle but, looking into his eyes, she couldn't help the shiver that ran down her spine. The message of her father was loud and clear. He knew about her affair with Anwar - because for him it couldn't be anything more than some sick affair - and he would see to it that nothing similar would happen in the future._

_She stepped out of his embrace terrified. A horrible thought occurred to her but she shook her head. No, her father couldn't have lied to her just to get rid of Anwar. And he certainly wouldn't have used her for that. It was simply unfathomable… and she couldn't believe it. She didn't want to believe it. But she couldn't help her stomach twist in fear as she thought about her child. What would happen to it?_

_As she looked at her father, she found herself unable to find the little girl in herself again, that same little girl who had clung to her father just minutes ago. The daughter was lost in her troubled thoughts. She could only look at the man in front of her as a mother, a mother whose sole mission was to protect her child. And at that moment she knew that that was exactly what she would do. It didn't matter that the man she had to come up against was the same man she had admired ever since she was a little girl._

"_I need a break." She spoke up and it took every bit of her self-control not to let her voice tremble. "I need a little time to sort out my thoughts and after that I will be able to concentrate on my job properly."_

"_Alright, Ziva." Her father nodded. "Take your time."_

_Ziva slowly stepped back up to her father cupping one of his cheeks with one hand and placing a gentle kiss on the other. When she pulled away, she gave him a sad smile._

"_Good bye, Father." With that she quickly left the office._

_She knew that she wouldn't be back for quite some time__… maybe ever._

_There were so many things that had to be addressed…__ from Anwar's death to her feelings towards her father… There were important decisions to make. She could feel the change in herself but she didn't know what to do with it… but in the middle of the chaos her life seemed to have become, one thing was for sure… whatever would happen in the future, whatever choices she would make, she would always make sure that her choice was the best for her child…_

_

* * *

_

"_So, Probie…" Mike Franks spoke up after a swing of his beer as he and Gibbs were sitting in front of his cabin in Mexico. "When can I expect little Gibbses running around here?" He smirked as Gibbs posture turned visibly uncomfortable._

"_Come on, Mike." Gibbs tried to drop the subject with an embarrassed smile but Franks didn't have any of it._

"_I'm serious here, Probie. Look at that wife of yours. She's young, full of energy… and she's good with kids. Amira seems to love her. And don't tell me that you don't want kids."_

_Gibbs turned towards the shore where Ziva and Layla were walking with little Amira clinging to their hands between them. Gibbs had to chuckle when Amira's delighted squeal reached his ears when the cool sea water hit her feet just before she was lifted up into the air and then put back down into the dam sand. The women holding her hands laughed joyfully at the little girl's enjoyment._

"_Ah… I don't know, Mike." Gibbs shook his head bitterly as he turned his attention back to his friend._

"_You don't know?" Franks scoffed. "It's not a very complicated matter. It's simple logic, even for you, Probie. You love Lady Ziva and God knows why but she loves you, too. You married her so it's time for you to start a family. It's as simple as that." There was a time when Gibbs thought so, too. He wasn't naïve, no, he was far from that but it had been indeed that simple with Shannon. He just simply assumed that it was the way it worked. You love someone, you marry her then you have kids. End of story. Of course his ex-wives were a completely other question. And so was Ziva, it seemed. But while he didn't love his ex-wifes, well, he loved them alright, but he certainly wasn't in love with them, he loved Ziva so much that sometimes it scared him. But she was a complicated woman..._

_He could clearly remember a curt conversation, for example, during a case when he asked Ziva whether she wanted children. She hesitated in giving him an answer and he couldn't understand what was there to think about._

_Now he knew._

"_Well, Probie…" Franks continued after Gibbs didn't seem willing to react. "Let me give you some advice here. Don't think too much about it because time will go by and one day you'll realize that you grew an old man."_

"_That's it, Mike. I am an old man." That certainly was one of the reasons of his hesitation._

"_That's bullshit, Probie, and you know that. And your little lady knows that, too." With that it seemed as though Franks had dropped the subject and Gibbs settled down comfortably in his chair watching the girls. "Damn it, Probie." Franks spoke up once again and Gibbs had to roll his eyes. Since when had Mike become an expert on relationships? "If I were you, I'd sure grab my wife, throw her on my shoulder and go have my way with her." And when did knocking up her wife become a central subject for them?_

"_What's with the cave mentality, Mike?" Gibbs raised an eyebrow._

"_I'm just saying...trying to give you ideas... But you know what? Consider this. If you're really lucky, you'd have beautiful children. I can just see them... brown eyes, tanned skin, curly hair..."_

"_You do realize that those imaginary kids of yours don't look anything like me?" Gibbs interrupted his friend._

"_That's what I'm saying, Probie." Franks replied indignantly with a little smile playing in the corner of his mouth. Gibbs had to laugh out._

_

* * *

_

Gibbs was down in the basement occupying himself with an old cabinet Ziva had fallen in love with at a yard sale. Since he and Ziva got married, the amount of time he spent down there hadn't changed a bit as one would have expected. On the contrary, he and Ziva spent so much time there that he liked to joke that they should move the bed and the fridge down to the basement and they would be good to live their lives in the dusty room. Of course Ziva wouldn't have any of it, but she loved spending time down there nonetheless. She would help him with whatever she could do or more often she just sat down in her armchair with a book or something else to keep her busy. They just liked spending time together that way.

Tonight, though, he was alone and when he heard the stairs squeak, he tensed. It wasn't Ziva coming down to him.

"It's just me, Gibbs. Don't shoot!" He had to smile at the familiar rusty voice. There was something strange in his favorite lab tech's voice, though, and when she finally got into his view, he instantly knew that something wasn't right with his girl. It seemed that her outburst earlier that day hadn't been just the result of her Caf-Pow depravation.

Abby was standing at the bottom of the stairs wearing only her PJs, which were imprinted by little sculls, with a huge sweater on them. Her hair was loose and tousled and gone was her dark make-up.

"What's wrong, Abs?" He asked concerned stepping closer to her. He didn't get any answers, though, as Abby just kept standing in front of him looking everywhere but at him. At that moment she looked so much like a lost little girl that Gibbs couldn't help stepping even closer and, without any word, taking her into a comforting hug. And Abby clung to him like a child to her father. "Talk to me, Abs." He asked her kissing her hair.

Slowly, Abby pulled away and looked at him almost shyly.

"Actually, Gibbs, I was hoping to talk to the other Gibbs."

Gibbs chuckled at the way Abby was fidgeting awkwardly once again avoiding his eyes. He could only guest that whatever the problem was, Abby wasn't comfortable discussing it with him.

"Well, the other Gibbs is probably in the guest room tucking in the other Abby." He told her smiling gently and finally he got a little smile from the Goth, who nodded then turned and slowly went up the stairs.

Upstairs, Abby didn't have to go to the guest room because in the dark hallway there was only one room from where some light came.

She stopped by the door of the bedroom, which was slightly ajar, and carefully pushed it. The sight that greeted her melted her heart and it made her momentarily forget why she was there at the first place. In the middle of the bed little Abby was sleeping peacefully with Ziva lying next to her with her head resting on her hand. She hadn't noticed Abby standing by the door, or if she had, she didn't show any sign of it. She just kept stroking the little girl's face while she was singing in a low voice.

"Ziva?" Abby's voice sounded uncharacteristically unsure. And only when Ziva looked up at her, did she realize that her Israeli friend's face was tearstained.

"Abby?" Ziva was startled for a moment but her friend's disheveled appearance quickly made her alert. She quickly brushed away her tears but didn't move from her position. "Is everything alright, Abby?" She asked concerned.

Abby didn't answer for a long moment trying to decide whether to impose on her clearly equally troubled friend or just leave it at that and tell her that she had just wanted to chat a little. However, Ziva was regarding her with such a concerned expression that Abby couldn't help it when finally her mouth quivered slightly and the tears began to fall.

"Oh, come on, Abby… come here." Ziva motioned for her to settle down next to her and her sleeping ward. With only a slight hesitation Abby made her way to the bed and lay down facing Ziva. By that time she had been openly sobbing. "Oh, Abby… hush now… hush…" Ziva whispered soothingly to her sobbing friend and stroked her cheek with motherly affection. The gesture wasn't lost on Abby and it made her cry even more.

After a while, with the help of Ziva's soft strokes and her soothing voice as she was singing the same song that Abby had previously heard, the Goth finally managed to calm down. She didn't say anything, though, for quite a while. They just lay in bed in silence with the sleeping girl between them. Ziva found it quite amusing that the little girl could sleep through such a commission.

"I'm pregnant." Abby broke the silence and Ziva's eyes snapped up at her friend in surprise.

For a few moments there was stunned silence in the room as Ziva didn't quite know what to say and Abby didn't seem willing to elaborate.

"Well…" Ziva began uncertainly. "It is good news, yes?" She searched the eyes of her friend but Abby diverted her gaze and began to regard the edge of her pillow with fascination.

"No… Yes… No… I guess… I'm not quite sure."

"Abby?" She slowly looked up at Ziva.

"Sorry. I'm just pretty shaken up at the moment. I don't know what to think. I can't be a mother."

"Why do you think that, Abby?"

"Are you kidding me? Look at me, Ziva. Do I look like a mother figure to you? My neighbor wouldn't trust me with her cat. Actually she did once but that sneaky little bastard ran away… I'm not cut out for a baby. What would happen to it? The poor thing wouldn't even be able to run away if it is fed up with me… at least not for a while… What?"

"Abby, you are panicking." Ziva stated with a gentle smile cupping Abby's face.

"Damn right I am."

"Then stop it! You are speaking as if you had to do all of this alone but you do not. You have Tim. God knows how much that means. I had to do it all alone, sure I got help but having the father of your child with you…" Abby's eyes widened for a moment but she had no chance to react to this new piece of information because Ziva quickly realized what she had just let slip out. "What I want to say is that Tim loves you and I am sure that he will be there for you."

"Yes, but…"

"There are no buts, Abby…" Ziva's voice sounded hard, almost angry but then she continued in a gentler tone. "Think about this way, you have got a gift, a gift you have to cherish because you can never take it for granted… never." She looked down sadly at the little girl and stroked her cheek gently. "They are the best thing that can happen to you."

"You think I can do it?"

"No, Abby." Ziva looked back up at her friend. "I know you can do it." She gave her an encouraging smile at which the Goth smiled back at her then leant over little Abby to give her friend s half-hug.

"I love you, Ziva. You are the best."

"I love you, too, Abby." Ziva chuckled happily after this sudden change of mood in her friend.

Abby lay back on the bed and a dreamy expression appeared on her face.

"I'm going to be a mother." She stated to nobody in particular then a little frown appeared on his face and she turned her head towards Ziva. "It's quite scary, you know."

"Yes, I know." Ziva concurred and squeezed Abby's hand.

Later that night Gibbs went up to go to bed but when he entered the bedroom, he stopped. Little Abby was sleeping peacefully on her back in the middle of the bed under the covers. Ziva's head was resting just right above hers, her lips slightly parted and her arm reaching over the little girl and resting on the waist of the other Abby, who was also sleeping soundly facing Ziva. Gibbs smiled gently at his girls then went to grab a blanket and lay it on Abby, who was lying over the covers, then he turned off the light and silently closed the door behind him. It looked like that he would spend the night on the couch.

**TBC**

_Thanks for reading!_


	9. Bad Day Part 1

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

_Hey, there! I took a little detour but here is the next chapter! Enjoy!_

_Oh, and I'm really grateful for the reviews! You are great!_

Chapter 9: Bad Day (Part 1)

Gibbs woke up early, very early, and he definitely wasn't a happy camper. It wasn't bad enough that he had to sleep on the couch but he had to sleep there alone. As a marine he could fall asleep technically anywhere and under any conditions. That night, however, was the longest night he had in a very long time. He missed his wife and his back was killing him.

He was sure that it would take at least two mugs of coffee, before he could communicate with anybody without biting their heads off.

Three mugs of coffee later he was standing in front of the oven making pancakes for the girls. Despite his still quite grumpy mood, Gibbs had to smile when he heard the drumming of feet coming down the stairs and his smile just got wider when he laid eyes on the three figures standing in the kitchen door. They looked so adorably cute all wrinkled freshly out of bed, with sleepy eyes and tousled hair.

"Morning." He greeted the little commission cheerfully. His mood considerably improved as soon as the girls joined him in the kitchen, plus he always made great efforts to be as jolly as possible in the morning. He simply loved his wife's reaction to it. As it could have been predicted, Ziva threw a dirty look in his direction – because he did know how annoying she found anybody who could be so chipper in the morning – and with a grouchy 'I need coffee' she made her way to the coffee pot. Gibbs still found it amusing that his wife, who always seemed to be alert at any given time of the day, was actually not a morning person and it really took her serious efforts to leave the bed. That's it given that there was no imminent danger or something like that. In that case she could be up and awake as if she hadn't been sleeping at all.

Little Abby settled down by the table with a huge yawn and Abby stayed rooted to the spot. She looked too pale for her own good, Gibbs noted.

"You know, Gibbs, if the smell of the pancakes didn't make me feel so terribly sick, I would find it really amusing that you're standing in the kitchen in your boxers making breakfast." She frowned then turned on her heels and ran to the bathroom. Gibbs looked at his wife worried.

"Is she alright?"

Ziva just shrugged clinging to her mug as if her life had depended on it. "She will be." She told him and Gibbs turned back to the pancakes. After Ziva had drunk her coffee and she felt up to begin the day, she put a mug of tea in front of little Abby, kissed her head then stood behind Gibbs circling his waist and burying her head into his back. "Good morning, my love." She murmured and Gibbs turned around to kiss his wife good morning. "Morning." He whispered into her ear then pulled her closer into his embrace.

"You are quite clingy, yes?" Ziva chuckled.

"I spent the night alone on the couch so I have every right to be clingy."

"I love you, too, my big bad marine." Ziva grinned as she patted his cheek affectionately then Gibbs leant down to kiss her again. And it wasn't just a chaste kiss…

"You know there are just so many things my delicate stomach can take at the moment, plus, there is an underage in the room." Abby interrupted them. She looked considerably better than before, Gibbs noted with satisfaction, however his expression was visibly annoyed at the interruption. He gave her his best 'Are you kidding me?'-look.

"I slept on the couch, you know that right?" He hadn't slept on the couch for a long time and he definitely hadn't slept without his wife… well, since they got engaged. And his back was still hurting.

"Jethro, can you remember those mornings…" Ziva began looking up at her husband with a theatrically wistful expression then she slowly turned away from him and walked towards the table where their friend was seated with little Abby. "...which we spent all alone in this kitchen without any interruption…" Here she looked pointedly at Abby and despite trying very hard to look annoyed, there was a smile threatening to erupt on her face and her eyes were shining with mirth as she stopped behind little Abby and put her hands on her ears before continuing in a sweet voice looking directly at the Goth but addressing her husband. "…you know, honey, just you and me screwing against that fridge…" Seeing the scandalized look on Abby's face, Ziva lost it and laughed out heartily.

"Gibbs…" Abby turned to the now laughing man with narrowed eyes. "Your wife has a dirty, dirty mind."

"Oh, you have no idea." Gibbs smirked.

* * *

After breakfast Abby offered to get little Abby dressed which Ziva accepted gladly, relieved that her friend seemed to be over her first shock about her pregnancy. She herself quickly got dressed then went to the bathroom to get the cloths, which she had left there the previous evening, out of the washing machine and to hang them out to dry. She smiled when little Abby's sweater got into her hand. It was such a cute little piece and suddenly she envied Abby for having a baby. Maybe someday, she thought…

She furrowed her brows when she noticed that something was left in the pocket of the sweater. She reached into it and pulled it out. Suddenly the room began to spin around her. In her hand there was a worn little purple gorilla. She didn't have any time to react, though, because Gibbs' voice came up to her.

"Move your butt, Ziva. We're leaving." With a trembling hand, she quickly stuffed the little toy into her own pocket then left the bathroom. "Abs? Take care of Abigail, will you?"

"Of course, Gibbs."

Ziva stopped short at the top of the stairs and looked at little Abby, who was standing nearby with Abby, as if she had seen a ghost. If she hadn't been so shocked at her discovery she would surely found it amazing how that English expression could have been used at her situation literally. She was indeed seeing a ghost.

"Where are we going, Jethro?" Ziva slowly tore her eyes away from the little girl and started down the stairs.

"Dinozzo's." Gibbs replied curtly and opened the door for Ziva. "I'll explain it in the car." If Ziva had paid more attention to her husband's body language, she would have noticed that his posture had become tense and his expression had changed into that unreadable mask that he usually wore during work. But her mind was wandering somewhere else…

The car ride to Tony's was a blur for Ziva. She could faintly remember Gibbs telling her something about Lora's father, being drunk, panicking and an ambulance but her mind was so preoccupied with that little purple gorilla and the implications of that little toy that she just couldn't focus on anything else. How could that be? It was a question she didn't have an answer for. The rational side of her mind was screaming at her… she had buried her daughter after all… and the fact that Abigail had a little purple gorilla didn't necessarily mean that she was Avigail… but the other side of her, the mother in her, oh, how she wished that it were true…

She was still deep in her thoughts when Gibbs pulled up in front of Tony's house. He took a quick worried glance at Ziva then got out of the car with a schooled expression. Ziva followed suit on autopilot but was stopped short by the sight that greeted her. Her eyes quickly became focused as she took in her environment. Gibbs also noted this change in her demeanor so he proceeded wordlessly towards the ambulance where Tony was standing visibly worried out of his mind.

The two agents stopped in front of their colleague and only then did Ziva realize that it was little Lora who was in need of medical attention.

"What the hell happened here, Dinozzo?" Gibbs asked looking at his agent.

"Oh, hey, Boss. Ziva." Tony acknowledges their presence but he was too occupied with the toddler sitting on the gurney to pay too much attention to them.

Fortunately it seemed that, apart from being flushed from crying, the girl was unharmed. She was currently occupied by the stethoscope, which was hung around her neck, and she was happy to show Ziva how it worked. When the Israeli woman settled down next to her on the gurney, Gibbs managed to pull Tony apart but the younger agent needed a well placed Gibbs-slap on the back of his head to turn his attention away from the girl.

"She's alright, Dinozzo." Gibbs told the younger agent. "But it can't be told about you if you don't begin to explain to me this whole mess."

"Yeah, about that…" Tony looked around sheepishly. Several police officers were still wandering around the perimeter and the whole commission with the police cars and ambulance had attracted quite an audience. "It's not a big deal, really." He told Gibbs who just stared at him. "Alright… but it certainly looks worse than it really is…" He tried to explain the situation while nervously rubbed the back of his neck but Gibbs interrupted him impatiently.

"Why?"

"That bastard came back for Lora." Tony stated and Gibbs narrowed his eyes when he noticed the change in Tony's posture and saw the anger in his eyes. "He came here totally wasted, began shouting all around claiming that nobody can take away his daughter from him, I tried to calm him down but he just got worked up even more and he managed to scare Lora to death and she got a panic attack or something so I called 911…well, that's all between seven thirty and eight."

"And the man, Dinozzo?"

"What man?"

"The girl's father?" Gibbs was beginning to lose his patience.

"Oh, that scumbag. He's trying to sleep it off in that car." Tony pointed towards a police car. "I might have knocked him out." He added as an afterthought.

When they returned to the ambulance, they found the girls giggling, as Lora was listening to Ziva's heartbeat. The girl's merriment made the two men's mood lift, too. Tony could finally believe that indeed there was nothing serious to worry about concerning his little ward and Gibbs was relieved that Ziva was feeling better, too.

"Dinozzo, you meet us in the Navy Yard, Ziva and I will take care of Carpino." Gibbs stated when the ambulance had finally left. Tony nodded then took Lora inside while Gibbs and Ziva started towards the last remaining police car to collect their suspect.

The ride to the Navy Yard was silent once again. Carpino had fallen back to sleep once again and he was currently snoring on the backseat while Ziva had fallen back to her previous reverie and was staring out of the window wordlessly. It worried Gibbs. Not the sitting in silence part. They spent much time together without saying a word but the present silence was filled with something he couldn't put his fingers on.

"Ziva." After checking the rearview mirror that Carpino was still asleep, Gibbs spoke up gently. It startled Ziva nonetheless. "Talk to me."

"What do you want to talk about?" She asked confused not really understanding his sudden need for a conversation.

Gibbs rolled his eyes.

"I don't want to talk, Ziver. I want you to talk. Something's bothering you and I want to know what. So please, tell me what it is."

"Nothing is bothering me." Ziva just shrugged then turned to look out the window.

"Well, something obviously is because you're acting strangely. What happened in the bathroom? You found somebody else's bra there?" He was obviously going for a smile here and he wasn't disappointed. Ziva turned back to him.

"Oh, you would not dare."

"That's very true." Gibbs agreed then after a short pause, he added. "And why would I, anyway?" He leant a little bit close as if sharing a secret with her. "I've already got the best."

"And that is also very true." She patted his tight.

"Ziver? You can talk to me, you know that, right?" It was obvious that Ziva wouldn't talk to him just yet but he hoped that she knew he would be there whenever she was ready.

"I know it, my love." She knew that she had been acting somewhat strangely in the last few days and she knew, too, that Gibbs was worried about her. But she didn't know what to tell her husband. How would some one tell her husband that the girl, they had taken in, might be her own daughter whom she had believed dead for years and about whom she had never talked before? It was indeed a difficult question but strangely enough, it wasn't the main reason Ziva was so reluctant to mention her daughter or her suspicion about Abigail. No, she knew and trusted Gibbs well enough not to worry about his reaction. But bringing up that part of her past would surely raise other questions as well, questions she didn't have the courage to answer. And most of all, she wasn't ready to admit to the man she loved with everything she had that the only other man in her life, whom she had loved the same way she loved him, had been killed by her own hand. How could he possibly trust her after that?

**TBC**

_So, now I think you can have a fairly good guess about little Abby... :-)_

_Thanks for reading!_


	10. Bad Day Part 2

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

_Italics__ are for Hebrew._

Chapter 10: Bad Day (Part 2)

McGee was sitting by his desk working, occasionally chuckling to himself when the happy giggles of little Abigail, who was watching _Finding Nemo_ with Palmer, reached him, but then the elevator pinged and the doors opened letting Gibbs, Ziva and Carpino into the squad room. Carpino felt considerably better after waking up and puking on Gibbs shoes but, in return, it made the already grumpy ex-marine very pissed off. He wasn't in a good mood and the resisting man didn't make anything to help and suddenly Carpino found himself pressed up against the wall with Gibbs' face just inches away from his.

"Keep it up, you son of a bitch…" He told him with such an intense gaze that the man shut up immediately. "You give me just one damn reason to shoot you and I'll do it." Gibbs continued staring at the man daring him when something else caught his attention.

Abigail had jumped up from her chair and run to Ziva with big frightened eyes. And for the first time she was speaking… she seemed to be repeating one thing over and over again while pulling Ziva's arm to make sure that the woman paid attention to her… but no one seemed to understand her… except for Ziva… While Palmer and McGee remained in the background observing the events and looking at each other with confused eyes and Gibbs loosened his grip on Carpino just enough to be able to turn towards the girl, Ziva kneeled down in front of the little girl and began to speak to her in a soothing voice, seemingly not at all taken aback by the little girl's outburst.

As the team watched on the scene in front of them, it became clear for them that Ziva was speaking on her native language.

After awhile Gibbs lost his patience that had been already running low.

"What the hell is going on here?" He asked Ziva in a tone, which made McGee and Palmer froze. They didn't think that anybody could ever hear Gibbs using that tone when addressing the Israeli woman. But he really couldn't help his tone. It wasn't enough that that son of a bitch had pissed him off big time but now he had a girl who hadn't spoken a word since they found her and now she was speaking fluent Hebrew. And Ziva didn't seem one bit surprised. What the hell did he miss?

"_Get him out of here!_" Reacting to Gibbs harsh tone, Ziva commanded with a hard expression as she stood up and pulled Abby closer to her. "Get him out of here!" She repeated herself after realizing that the first time she had spoken in Hebrew. "He is scaring her. She saw him killing the Major."

Gibbs all but pushed Carpino into the hands of an another agent, who just happened to be passing by, ordering him to take the suspect into an interrogation room then turned back to his team. Taking in Gibbs' tensed features, Palmer wisely opted for leaving so he silently, and very quickly, made his way to the elevator. McGee felt so small under his boss' stern gaze that he hadn't felt since high school but Ziva stood her ground and didn't even blink when Gibbs' gaze fell on her.

"_Did I do something wrong?_" Abby whispered in a teary voice while she looked up at Ziva.

"_No, my angel, you have not done anything wrong._" Ziva stroked her hair soothingly.

"McGee, pull up the girl's personal file from Social Services." His eyes not leaving Ziva, Gibbs barked at his agent, who was by his computer in a second. While McGee was typing furiously on his keyboard, the two Gibbses stood motionless. Gibbs' grumpiness and impatience was quickly making Ziva pissed, too. And one pissed off Gibbs was bad enough, not to mention two…

"Uhm, Boss… I can't find anything under the name of Abigail Green."

"What do you mean you can't find anything?" Gibbs snapped as he went to stand behind the younger man.

Meanwhile, Ziva slowly led Abby to her desk and sat her down. As she was crouching in front of the somewhat frightened girl, gently stroking her cheek, she was furiously trying to put together the pieces. As her brain worked, everything, even Gibbs' unreasonable outburst, seemed to fade into the background. All she could think about was her baby girl.

Then Abigail spoke up in a hardly audible voice.

"_My name is not Abigail. Only Mrs. Wilson calls me that_." Suddenly tears flooded Ziva's eyes as she looked at the girl and when she whispered her real name in awe, Avigail just nodded slightly.

The other two men seemed completely unaware of the scene playing out in the background. McGee was trying his hardest not anger his boss even more and Gibbs was too frustrated to pay any attention to anything else other than finding out who that girl was.

"I mean there's nothing. She doesn't exist." McGee told his boss carefully. Gibbs punched his fist on the desk frustrated. McGee jumped visibly.

"What the hell is going on?" The team leader cried out.

"Tim, try Avigail Grinberg." Ziva told gently, after she had wiped away her tears trying to take up a professional attitude, as she walked up to her friend's desk. That would make sense, in a twisted and completely disgusting way. Rebecca Grinberg. She was working close to Eli David in Tel Aviv. She wasn't working on the field. She was more like a secretary, a person to whom Eli David went if he wanted to take care of something in a more subtle way than usual. If something was about paperwork, Rebecca could do anything. Ziva had already known that her father had known about her daughter and now it didn't seem such a farfetched idea that he had something to do with all of this.

McGee did as Ziva had told him to do but, again, there was nothing.

"Try Greenberg." Ziva offered while Gibbs regarded her with narrowed eyes. There was something about her he couldn't place. She looked fidgety as if she was nervous, or more exactly, impatient. But why? He felt totally out of the loop and he hated it.

"Here it is. Avigail Greenberg." McGee seemed visibly relieved that he had managed to find what Gibbs had been looking for. "She's from Israel, Boss. He father died there and she came to the US with her mother, Rebecca Greenberg, about a year and a half ago." Gibbs could hear Ziva's sharp intake of breath when the woman's picture appeared on the screen, supporting her theory, but he let McGee continue. "The mother died shortly after emigrating. Poor girl. She doesn't have any relatives in Israel so she stayed here and got into the system."

Only after McGee had finished his report, did Gibbs turn to Ziva, who was staring at the picture of Rebecca Greenberg.

"Ziva." Gibbs tried to get her attention. "If there's something you want to share, it's the time for it."

The woman slowly tore her gaze away from the picture and looked at the still very annoyed team leader then she looked back at the little girl, who was observing the events with furrowed brows and wrinkled nose. Ziva gave her a little smile then turned back to Gibbs.

"I know, or I knew Rebecca Greenberg. Back in Israel." She began in a low voice so Abby couldn't hear her. "Her real name is Rebecca Grinberg. She was a close friend of Ari but after a time they lost contact. I have not even seen her in years. She mostly worked for Eli…"

"Ziva." Gibbs interrupted her impatiently. "Your point?"

"My point?" Ziva stepped closer to the man and met her annoyed gaze with an angry one. "My point is that she is not Abigail's mother."

"Really?" Gibbs also took a step closer. "And you know that because?"

"Because I am her mother." She stepped even closer so they were standing face to face.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"She is my daughter, Jethro." Her voice became gentler as she made her declaration but she kept her stance. She didn't want to tell him that way but it was out now and she waited for her husband's reaction with tense anticipation.

"And when did you plan to share it with me?" Gibbs spat at her and Ziva involuntarily took a step back as if Gibbs had just hit her.

"What?" That was all she could manage in her sudden shock. She wasn't sure what she had expected from Gibbs but surely she hadn't expected him to snap like that and definitely not in front of the whole squad room.

"I asked when you intended to share this information with me, Agent David." His tone was measured and for a moment plain hurt could be seen on Ziva's face but almost immediately her jaw clenched in anger. So that was it. She was Agent David. If Gibbs wanted to play it that way, so be it.

"I did not deem this information important concerning our case, Agent Gibbs." Her professional, cold voice seemed to snap Gibbs out of his anger induced state but it was too late. "And I think it is still not important, yes? The case is closed. I believe that you do not need me to get Carpino's confession. That is unless you want his neck snapped." She didn't bother to hide her anger at the man who was standing in front of her. She turned her back on a speechless Gibbs and walked back to her desk to gather her things and Avigail.

"And where the hell do you think you are going?" Gibbs called after her.

"Home. You will get my report tomorrow morning." She didn't even stop while answering.

McGee sat by his desk visibly stunned while Gibbs stared after his wife. What the hell had just happened? He couldn't fully comprehend the scene that had played out between Ziva and him but one thing was for sure. He screwed up, and he screwed up big time.

"Damn it!" He hit his fist into the first thing that came into his way then left.

McGee just kept sitting by his desk his mouth hanging open and that was the way how Tony and Lora found him some time later.

* * *

Ziva was standing down in the basement chatting silently with Avigail who was sitting crossed legged on the working counter. After storming out of the NCIS building, she brought her girl home. They had had a lot of things to talk about but before she'd have sat her down to talk to her, Ziva had called Abby to ask her to run a DNA test. The Goth agreed without hesitation and without further questions, but Ziva almost broke down nonetheless while talking with her friend.

At the moment they were looking at those photographs, which were hung on the wall. Avigail was a very clever little girl and she took the news very well. At first, after telling her that she was her mother, Ziva got worried because Avigail got silent but then she could feel the relief wash over her when the little girl stood up and stepped to her to snake her little arms around her neck. At first Ziva just sat frozen not sure what the girl was about to do but when she felt her arms tighten around her neck and she could feel her soft curls under her chin, she let out a laugh that was mixed with a sob. She didn't know what to do so she laughed and cried at the same time while she hugged her little girl close to her.

Ziva was in the middle of an explanation about Shannon and Kelly, whose pictures were now in her hands, when she heard some one walking upstairs. For a moment she tensed. She wasn't ready to face Gibbs, not yet. He had hurt her. He had promised that he would be there for her. He had promised that there was nothing in her past that would make him question her. And yet, he had been treated her like a suspect. She was angry at him and what hurt her the most, she was disappointed in him.

A little smile appeared on her face when she heard Lora's giggling and not long after that she could see Tony coming down the stairs with the little girl in his arms. When they reached the bottom, he put the toddler on the floor, and she happily ran to the Israeli woman.

"Hey, angel." She scooped up the little girl. "What are you doing here?"

"We just saw that the lights were on, so we thought that we'd pop in and say hi." Tony supplied as he walked up to the girls.

"The lights are on?" Ziva frowned and Tony rolled his eyes. Avigail chuckled.

"So you do know English." Tony turned to the girl who nodded.

"Actually she understands most of the things. She just does not speak so well." Ziva explained as she stroked her daughter's cheek proudly.

"_Can I take Lora up to play?_"

"_Of course, angel._" Ziva replied as she put Lora down. Avigail jumped from the counter and after grabbing the younger girl's hand, they made their way towards the stairs. Ziva waited for them to reach the top then she turned to Tony.

"Shall we go up?" Tony nodded then watched Ziva as she wordlessly pinned the photo of Gibbs' late family back to the wall among the others. His gaze roamed around the pictures on the wall and his eyes rested for a while on the one that was taken years before. He smiled gently as he regarded Kate's laughing form but then he turned his attention back to the woman next to him.

Without any words they made their way up and settled down by the dining table watching the girls playing in the living room.

"He knows that he screwed up." Tony stated after a long time of silence, his eyes not leaving the girls. Though, he wasn't there when all hell broke loose but he heard about everything and he didn't like it one bit. And when Abby told him that Ziva was on the verge of crying when she had called her, Tony needed all of his self-control not to go to Gibbs and punch him in the face. He was angry at him for hurting Ziva like that but he would be damned if he let his friends destroy everything they had managed to build up. So instead of beating up his boss, Tony decided on a more tactful approach. "I'm sure he didn't mean to hurt you the way he did."

"He might not." Ziva snapped her head towards Tony. Her gaze was angry. "But he did nonetheless."

"Ziva…"

"No, Tony. There is nothing to say here. He made me a promise. I was ready to leave him… to ignore everything I feel because I knew that we would get to this point. But he promised me. He promised me that no matter what, he would not judge me… he would be there for me. That was the time for him to be there for me and what did he do? He treated me like a suspect… he questioned me. He did not even have the decency to talk to me in private… to hear me out. I had to disappoint in him… and at the moment I do not know how to deal with it."

"I understand you, Ziva, really. But promise me something." Tony's gaze was so intense, so serious as he was looking into Ziva's angry eyes that Ziva found her anger disappear in her surprise. After all the years, she still found it difficult to deal with a serious and all grown up Tony Dinozzo. She wasn't really used to this side of her friend and the fact that only really serious events were able to bring out this responsible side of him, made her stomach twist in fear. What if that was it and there was no way back for them? The possibility of losing her husband scared her, even though at the moment she didn't even want to see him.

"What do you want, Tony?" As the anger left her eyes, the pain and anguish in them became clearly visible.

"I want you to talk to him. Don't send him away when he comes to talk to you." Ziva scoffed and moved to stand up but Tony quickly grabbed her arm. "I don't want to tell you how to deal with this whole mess but promise me that you'll hear him out. Just give the old man a chance."

For a few seconds Ziva was just staring into his blue eyes. She could see that it was very important for him. He cared about both of them.

"You are a good friend, Tony." She cupped his cheek with her free hand, as Tony was still holding to her arm, and looked at him affectionately.

"Promise me." Tony insisted.

"I promise." She didn't know how she'd do that but she would try… for Tony's sake... for their own sake.

They watched the girls for a little longer without any further conversation but when Ziva glanced at Tony, she saw something that made her concerned. There was something else other than her fallout with Gibbs that bothered the man.

"What is bothering you, Tony?" She inquired gently but Tony just shrugged.

"Nothing."

"Come on, Tony. Talk to me. You are not the only one here who can poke into somebody else's business, you know. So?"

"Social Services will pick up Lora tomorrow." Tony began with a heavy sigh then looked at Ziva and gave her a smile that was between sad and embarrassed. "I'll miss her, you know. These few days, I know that I complained a lot, but it was an incredible experience. I'll miss all of this. I'll miss my little girl." He looked back at Lora for a few seconds then he turned back to Ziva who was smiling at him teasingly. "What?"

"Nothing. It is just strange to see you like that. You are growing up, Tony."

Tony turned away from her once again and this time his laugh was clearly embarrassed.

"Yeah, a little girl looking up at you with her innocent eyes and calling you Dada does that." Ziva raised her eyebrows at that then she reached for his hand that was lying on the table.

"Tony, look at me." Her voice was gentle and she waited patiently for Tony to comply. "I have already promised you something, now, you promise me something." Tony nodded solemnly and Ziva squeezed his hand. "Do not let her go."

"Are you serious?" Tony laughed up but the insincerity of his laugh and the look in his eyes made Ziva think that he had already thought about it. "Do you really think that she would have a good place with me?"

"Are you asking me if you made a good father?" Now Ziva had a serious sense of déjà vu. What was up with the team? "Tony, if you did not make a good father, Lora would not have trusted you. And she would definitely not refer you as her dad. Tony, if you let your fear take over you, you will let a once in a lifetime opportunity slip out of your hands. Not to mention that Lora would go to a new foster family. Do you really want that?"

"No, I don't."

"Then grow a pair already and do something about it." Ziva nudged him at which Tony gave her a strange look.

"What?" She asked.

"You are using quite a colourful language there, Zeevah." Tony told her and Ziva shrugged happy to see that the old bantering Tony was back. "Come here." Tony told her while he stood up and offered her his hand. Ziva accepted it without hesitation and in the next instant she was enveloped in a bear hug. "I love you, ninja girl." Ziva laughed into his chest.

"I love you, too, Tony." She tightened her hold on him. "Everything will be alright, yes?"

"Yes, everything will be alright." He told her then they just stood there in silence content to have their friends' support. "Ziva?" Tony spoke up first and loosened his grip a little.

"Yes?" Ziva looked up at him.

"Can you look after Lora for a little while?"

A huge grin appeared on Ziva's face as she nodded. Tony quickly let her go and after placing a kiss on her forehead, he said goodbye to the girls then left in a hurry. After all, he had a lot of things to take care of… and a lot of favors to ask…

Ziva looked after her friend with a smile, which then quickly disappeared and she looked back at the girls worried. What would happen to Avigail?

**TBC**

_If you feel confused, don't worry, hopefully there will be some answers in the next chapter._

_Thanks for reading!_


	11. The Winner Takes It All

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

_Hey, there! It took me a long time but here's the next chapter. And I owe a huge "thank you" for it to Zivacentric, because without her support, and not to mention endless patience in listening to my constant ramblings, I would surely be nowhere near posting this chapter. So, thank you my friend! You are great! _

Chapter 11: The Winner Takes It All

Gibbs quickly made his way down the stairs into the basement. It was quite late and there was only darkness in the whole house. Ziva must be sleeping in their bed, he thought… or in the guest room with little Abby… or Avigail as it had turned out. At least he would consider himself a lucky man if that was so and Ziva hadn't already packed up and left. But somehow he doubted that. Ziva wasn't the running kind. She was a fighter and Gibbs really hoped that she wanted to fight it out.

He quickly downed the bourbon he had just poured into his mug then leant heavily on the counter hanging his head in defeat.

It had been a very long day and what could get screwed up, it surely did. The worst part was that he himself had screwed up. He was such an idiot, an idiot who acted impulsively and without any thought rather than letting his brain work just a little. Then he might have not hurt the most important person in his life.

He sighed heavily while rubbing his tired eyes. What should he do now? He had hurt Ziva in a way he promised he'd never do. He had let her down in the worst way possible. And he didn't even know why. He told her once that whatever was in the past, it belonged there, and if she felt like talking about it, he would be there to listen. He meant every word of it. Of course, the fact that her daughter came back from the dead changed the situation somewhat but, hell, he had made a vow that he would stand by her for better and for worse… and if somebody should ask him, Ziva getting back her daughter definitely didn't belong to the 'worse' category. If anybody, he knew what such an opportunity meant…

And yet he had treated her as a simple agent, worse, he had treated her like an uncooperative suspect…

Suddenly he felt something strange… as if somebody had been in the room with him. He raised his head and tried to concentrate on the presence, which had disturbed his thoughts, but suddenly his attention was diverted. On the wall in front of him where he and Ziva began to put pictures, which held memories for them, he spotted a picture, which hadn't been there before. There was Ziva on it… a pregnant Ziva sitting on a bed with crossed legs. She was smiling gently at whoever was holding the camera but somehow her smile remained sad. She looked breathtaking, though, with her dark curly hair loosely put back in a ponytail wearing a man's button-up shirt. The weigh that she had undoubtedly put on during her pregnancy just made her more attractive if that was a good word to use. There were a couple of other pictures, too, he noticed. On one of them there was a young tall man standing, holding a young petite woman in his arms. He leant closer and he could see that the young woman was Ziva and on that photo she was truly smiling and so was the man next to her. On another picture a teenager Ziva was clinging on the back of a young man pressing her cheek to the man's, laughing. He took that picture from the wall and as he took a closer look at it, anger flared in him when he realized that the young man was Ari Haswari.

"He had not always been that sick bastard you knew, Jethro." He snapped up his head at the soft voice coming from his right and, for the first time, he noticed Ziva. She was sitting on the counter with crossed legs and closed eyes. She looked serene as if their argument earlier that day hadn't even happened. Relief washed over Gibbs. Ziva was ready to talk… and he was ready to listen. "He was a good man. I know that it is hard to believe but he really was."

"Ziva, I…"

"No." She opened her eyes and looked at her husband. "You are right when you condemn the man who killed one of your men… one of your friends. He was a mad man blinded by revenge… and unfortunately I was one of the reasons of his rage against our father and ultimately one of the reasons of Kate's death… I can understand all of your feelings towards him… I felt it, too… but I will never be able to think of him merely as a heartless killer. He was much more than that, Jethro." She reached out and took the picture from his grasp then looked at it with a sad nostalgic smile. "He was so much more. He was my hero… and I was his princess."

"Tell me about him, Ziva." Tentatively, Gibbs stepped closer to his wife and placed his hands on her knees. Ziva's words about her brother made him curious and he wanted to know more about the man Ziva had killed for him. He wanted to know more about her brother.

Ziva slowly raised her head and smiled at the man standing in front of her.

"You know, I loved my father." She laughed out bitterly. "I admired him and there was nothing I would not have done just to earn some good words from him… just to make him look at me with pride in his eyes. And it happened. It really did happen. But I had to earn his affection. But Ari… He loved me even if I behaved as a spoiled child." This time when she laughed out it wasn't bitter. "I remember when Tali was born, I got really jealous of her because suddenly she had all our father's attention. And it remained like that." She added a little disappointed. "She was everything that I was not and she got everything that I did not. She could bewitch anybody with a simple smile. And I was no exception, either."She added with a gentle loving smile, which left no doubt regarding her feelings for her little sister. "I loved my little sister dearly. But at that time I was just a little girl who could feel that she was getting out of the center of attention. That day I stormed up to my room sulking and Ari came after me. I remember him promising me that he will always love me. He was about ten that time, just a child really, but he promised me that he would always make sure that I know just how much he cared for me." She brushed away her now slowly appearing tears angrily. "I just want you to know that I love him no matter what he had done. I just… love him…" Ziva fell silent and Gibbs leant closer to her to place a kiss on her forehead. He stayed like that for a long time, his lips to her forehead, thinking. It was so hard to imagine that murderer like a loving brother but Ziva's clear affection towards him made Gibbs revaluate his opinion about Ari. He would never be able to forgive the man who had killed Kate but he could surely make an effort to see that man in him whom his wife loved so much… yes, he could do that for Ziva.

"You know…" Gibbs spoke up. "…that time when he held Kate hostage in the morgue… Kate had the chance to kill him but she said that she couldn't because she saw something in his eyes… I could never understand what she could possibly see in them… until now…" He pulled away from Ziva who gave him a grateful smile.

"I am sorry, Jethro." She told him in the same manner as she had told him in the interrogation room after Somalia. "I should have told you about my past earlier. I should have talked today when you asked me. But believe me if I tell you that I was not sure about Avigail until I saw Rebecca's picture. I lost her, Jethro. I buried her years ago."

"I'm sorry, too, Ziva." Gibbs offered his own apology. And this time neither of them mentioned his rule about apologizing. "I think I didn't really comprehend what you said at that time. I should have reacted differently. I just hope that you can forgive me for being a jerk."

Ziva reached up to pull Gibbs' face closer to her then she kissed him tenderly.

"I love you, Jethro." She whispered, their forehead touching. "You are a good man… sometimes quite pigheaded but a good man nonetheless."

"I love you, too, Ziver." He smiled then leant in to brush his lips against hers.

For a little while they stayed in each other's arms, just enjoying the other's closeness to which they had got so close to lose that day.

"There are so many things I should tell you." Ziva began after a little while. "I want to tell you about my childhood, about Tali and Ari, about my years in Mossad… and about Avigail's father."

"You have all the time in the world, Ziva." Gibbs gently took back the picture from her then stepped to the wall and pinned it back to its place.

Ziva watched her husband with curious eyes as he observed all of the other pictures on the wall.

"His name is Anwar." She told him when she noticed that his eyes were regarding the young man with a critical look. "He is Avigail's father." It felt strange for her to say those words out aloud but at the same time it felt good to acknowledge it at last to somebody else other than herself.

"Well, he's quite a good looking guy. And young, too…" Gibbs stated with slight jealousy in his voice, which made Ziva smile. Trust Gibbs to feel self-conscious if a younger man comes into the picture.

"He is dead." She told him softly. Gibbs looked at her questioningly and Ziva closed her eyes for several moments, steeling herself for what she had to tell her husband. Slowly she opened her eyes and offered her outstretched hand to Gibbs, who took it and let her pull him back in front of her. When he stood face to face with her again, she grasped both of his hands with hers and held onto them for dear life. She watched their hands for a while then she raised her gaze and looked straight into her husband's icy blue eyes. "I killed him." She stated, her glance never wavering from his. "I was carrying his child… I was in love with him… and I killed him."

Gibbs could see the shame in her eyes but he couldn't offer anything to make her feel better. This declaration took him by surprise and suddenly he didn't know how to react. So he remained silent and watched as Ziva bowed her head.

"I was following orders… my father's orders. He told me that Anwar had betrayed us…" Ziva's voice broke as she lived through that awful day once again. Gibbs just watched on as she was struggling with the words while staring intently on their joined hands. His heart went out for his wife but all he could do was to shift his hands in Ziva's so now he was the one holding his wife's hands in his giving her some strength to continue. Because he knew that she had to continue. She had to get rid of her burdens. "I believed him even though a part of me could never believe the accusation. But I always believed my father. I always wanted to believe him. Always. It was not until before Somalia that I could finally see clearly. It was so late by then."

"And that was what drove you on that suicide mission." Ziva nodded still staring at their hands. Gibbs slowly reached up with one hand and gently lifted up her head to face him.

"What happened, Ziva? What made you want to die?" That question had been nagging him ever since that conversation in the interrogation room. He could never understand her behaviour. He could never understand why she had felt so guilty, why she wished for death so stubbornly. But he never dared to ask her… until now.

"What happened?" Ziva laughed out bitterly. "So many things had happened, Jethro. And I let them all happen. I executed Anwar… I buried my daughter… I killed my brother who most likely had done everything because of me… and finally I lost my father. I had to realize that he had lied to me in my whole life. He manipulated me… he used me…and he threw it all into my face when I was at my lowest. He accused Anwar because he could not bear the thought of his daughter being with some one like him. And he used me to execute his plan. He stole my daughter from me letting me believe that she had died. He wanted to raise her to be the perfect mole for him. Like Ari… He blackmailed me into a relationship with Rivkin promising me to have Avigail back… I almost killed Tony because of this…" Here she stopped as everything came rushing back to her and suddenly she felt as if she were suffocating in the torrent of her memories. Her breathing became erratic. Tears were now streaming down her face and her hands were shaking. Gibbs was afraid of her getting a panic attack so he let go off her hands and quickly cupped her face forcing her to look at him.

"Ziver…" He was looking into her eyes patiently waiting for her to focus.

When she finally did, Gibbs could feel his heart break into million little pieces. Ziva was visibly scared and at that moment he was seriously considering getting on the first plane to Israel and killing that son of a bitch who did that to her.

"Can you ever trust me again?" Gibbs felt the whole world crashing down on him as he heard Ziva's tiny voice. She was afraid of him?

"Oh, Ziver." That was all he could say as he could feel his voice break, and as he pulled his crying wife into his arms, he could feel his own tears, too. He let her cry. He let her cry thirty years worth of pain and despair out of her system. And he cried with her. He cried for that little girl who couldn't have that father she deserved. He cried for that young woman who had to lose her lover and for the mother who had to bury her daughter, for the sister who was forced to kill her brother, the only man who loved her in that cruel world. And he cried for his wife who had to suffer all of this.

When, after a long time, he could feel his wife's breathing even out and after his own tears had dried up, he slowly lifted Ziva up and together they slid down to the floor where he cradled her into his arms like a father cradles his little child.

"You know, in my whole life there was nothing that I wanted more than to be like my father." Ziva's voice, when she spoke up, wasn't above a whisper and Gibbs had to strain his ears to be able to hear her. "And only after becoming him did I realize what a monster he was. In my longing after my father's affection, I have become a monster. And I could not live with that. I could not live with myself after everything I had done. And I will not blame you if you do not want to do it, either."

With that said, she gave herself up to waiting. She had told him what she had to tell and now it was his turn to speak.

"I trust you, Ziva." Gibbs spoke up finally shifting Ziva in his arms so now she was facing him. "I thought I'd already proven it to you when I asked you to marry me. I had already trusted you with my life, you had earned it. And then, when I proposed to you in this basement, I trusted you with my heart, too, just as much as you trusted me with yours. I thought that was enough. But if you want me to tell you this, to put it into words instead of showing it to you then I'll do it. I do trust you. But you have to trust me, too. You have to believe me, Ziva, because without you I can't do it."

For some time Ziva couldn't speak. She was too stunned to do so. Slowly she reached up with one hand and softly put it against Gibbs' cheek. She regarded him as if it would have been the first time that she had seen him. As if under some kind of spell, she slowly ran her hand over his features. She touched his hairline, his brows then she ran a finger down his nose. She took in every inch of his face and when finally her fingers reached his lips, Gibbs took her discovering hand in his and kissed it gently.

"I trust you, Jethro. I always have." Ziva whispered. "I think that I just could not trust myself."

"I'm sorry, Ziver." Gibbs' voice was low, too, as he pressed Ziva's hand to his chest. "I'm sorry you had to go through all of this. But you have to realize that you'd never got any choice in any of this. Your father is a manipulative SOB. He knows how to use people… he knows how to get what he wants. And that monster you're talking about? Ziva, it died out there in Somalia. You are not that woman anymore who does as Eli David wants her to do. You've already made your choice when you came back to America as a liaison officer. And even before that. During the years you slowly took up your stance against Eli David. And that was the best you could have done, because otherwise you would be surely dead by now. Eli David had failed. You are the one who won, Ziva. All that terrible things that happened made you stronger. You didn't let them break you. You fought and you've become a good person, an excellent woman."

There was a long silence in the basement as Gibbs let Ziva take in everything ha had just said.

"I won." Ziva repeated uncertainly as she tried to grasp that idea.

"That's right." Gibbs nodded smiling lovingly at his wife.

"I won." A little smile appeared on Ziva's face as understanding dawned on her and then her smile became wider and she beamed at her husband proudly. "I won." And this time she was completely convinced about the truth of that statement. "Thank you, Jethro."

"For what?"

"For helping me fight. For helping me became that person you can love and trust."

"Ziva…" He didn't know what to say to that but it seemed that Ziva didn't need any answer because in the next instant she was kissing him. She was kissing him with everything she had… and he offered no less. When they pulled apart, Gibbs gave her a gentle smile.

"So, we have a daughter now?" His eyes were glinting with joy at the prospect of being a father again.

"Yes, my love." Ziva stroked his cheek lovingly. "We have a daughter now." And as she said those words, she felt truly happy. She had been happy before, yes. But now every burden seemed to have fallen down from her shoulders. She was free. She wished that her brother would have lived to see that day. She knew he had worked so hard to make it possible and, in a way, he had made it possible because without him, she wouldn't have come to America in the first place…

As she looked at her husband, a mischievous glint appeared in her eyes and her lips moved into a huge grin.

"What?" Gibbs asked unable to stop a grin of his own.

"You said that I won." Ziva answered while she ran a finger down Gibbs' chest following it with her eyes then she looked up at the man and raised an eyebrow suggestively.

"Yes..." Gibbs drew out.

"So, the winner takes it all, yes?" Ziva asked as she moved to straddle her husband, making sure that, in making so, she brushed up against him as much as possible.

"That is very true, darling." Gibbs whispered huskily into Ziva's ear sending pleasant shivers down her spine.

"Then I want everything. Now." Ziva breathed against his lips then closed the distance between them. During their quite heated kiss Ziva's hands moved to unbutton Gibbs' shirt but then the man's moved, too, to stop her. Ziva looked at her husband frustrated at which Gibbs only rolled his eyes.

"You do realize that we have a child in the house?" He asked her and Ziva groaned and buried her head into Gibbs' shoulder. "But we can always lock the door…" Gibbs suggested chuckling at his wife.

Ziva's head snapped up to look at him with a conspiratorial smile.

"It is a good thing then that I put Avigail down in the guest room, yes?" She told Gibbs then, in the next instant, she was out of his lap. "Move your butt, Marine." Ziva threw behind her back as she made her way towards the stairs with swaying hips, and a satisfied grin on her lips because she could literally feel his husband's eyes on her rear part. Gibbs was on his feet with such speed that would have put a horny teenager to shame.

"Impatient much, Ziva?" He whispered into her ear bemused as he reached her by the stairs and encircled her waist from behind.

"Oh, you have no idea." Ziva purred with a smile as she leant into him.

Little did they know that when they finally managed to stumble up the stairs and into their bedroom, they would find a sleeping girl there…

Oh well… the bright side of parenthood…

**TBC**

_Thanks for reading!_


	12. On the Right Track

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

_And once again, a huge "thank you" to Zivacentric because she kept nudging me and hence she played a great part in completing this chapter! This butt-kicking thing really works! :-D Keep it up, my friend and THANK YOU!_

_Enjoy!_

Chapter 12: On the Right Track

Ziva David Gibbs felt truly happy. She was in a place where she had never truly dared to imagine to ever be… not even when both Anwar and Ari had been there for her to make her believe…

She was lying in bed with her little girl's back pressed up against her front while her hand curled around her little waist. Her head was resting on her husband's arm who was lying on his back with Avigail's head buried into the crook of his neck and her little arm thrown over his chest.

Well, she and Gibbs did definitely not spend the night the way they had planned but Ziva wouldn't have changed a thing.

She could finally talk to Gibbs and he helped her put everything into perspective. She knew that she was still far away from the end of the road of acceptance and it was all too much possible that she would never get there… there were things that were just impossible to leave behind without any kind of remorse or self-reproach… but now she could really believe that even if she despised a part of her, there was and there would always be somebody to help her see the other part of her. There was somebody to love her unconditionally and accept her as she was…

And she got a second chance with her daughter… she'd got the opportunity to provide that kind of life for Avigail for which Ari had fought…

She sighed a little worried, though as she stroked her daughter's hair. Today she had to face Social Services and in spite of knowing that finally Avigail would stay with her… with them, she really didn't want to let them take her away even temporarily.

"They won't take her anywhere, Ziva." She was snapped out of her thoughts by her husband's voice.

She shifted a little so she could prop up her head on her hand then looked at Gibbs, who was already wide awake. She moved a little closer to kiss him good morning then looked at him with narrowed eyes trying to decipher his expression. It didn't really surprise her that he knew what she had been thinking about.

"You cannot know that." She told him with a serious expression. "They certainly will not leave her with us just because I tell them that I am her mother."

"Well, they won't take her away." Gibbs repeated himself.

"Why are you so sure?" Now Ziva had a strong suspicion that Gibbs had a hidden agenda.

"I talked to Vance." That was all he said.

"You talked to Vance? But when?"

"Well, I think after we scared the living shit out of McGee and after I managed to beat some sense into me."

Ziva didn't know what to say to that. Somehow she thought that Gibbs had spent the day being annoyed at her and consequently being annoying… but he managed to surprise her. And she felt bad about doubting him. After all that had happened and after she had walked out on him, he never stopped thinking about her. She shifted a little and kissed her husband… and she kissed him right.

"Thank you, my love." She told him and watched as an uncharacteristically huge grin appeared on Gibbs' face. "What?" She asked the man while a smile began to appear on her own lips.

"Nothing." Gibbs shook his head.

"Oh, no, mister. You are not wearing that idiotic Dinozzo grin just for nothing." She nudged him playfully.

"What? Can't a man be just happy?" He asked incredulously and actually laughed out loud when Ziva threw her arms around him.

And Avigail just kept sleeping on.

As Gibbs held her wife, practically squeezing the little girl between them, he wondered with a smile if her ability to sleep like a log was something she inherited from her mother…

* * *

_The woman fidgeted anxiously__ as she waited in the queue in front of the movie theatre and her hand trembled slightly as she took her ticket. Her eyes were sweeping through the crowd, nervously, as she made her way into the room and took her seat. She was nervous because of so many reasons but among all of them one stood out. Ari. She hadn't seen him in months, since his best friend's death, and when they parted it wasn't exactly on friendly terms. He was so insistent on his friend's innocence and so persistent in blaming his father for everything that he couldn't hear a word she was trying to say to him._

_She __had loved him. She still loved him but that man she had seen back then wasn't her Ari. He was worried and full of rage… such a burning rage that it finally turned him against her, too, and that left her questioning the sanity of the man._

_The movie theatre finally became dark and as the first shots of the movie began to roll, she could hear somebody taking the seat next to her._

"_Rebecca." The man whispered and her breath got caught in her throat. She so loved that voice. She didn't want to look at him, though. She didn't want to see that stranger who still haunted her memories but she couldn't help her head turning to the left and when it did, she was taken aback by what she had seen. There, in the seat next to her, there was Ari sitting… her Ari. She reached out tentatively to put her hand on his face and when she touched his skin, he pressed her hand to his cheek and looked at her with love evident in his brown eyes. "I missed you, my love." Rebecca told him in a trembling voice._

"_I need your help, Rebecca." The woman pulled back her hand somewhat disappointed but she held Ari's gaze__ waiting for the man to continue. "That baby Eli trusted on you… she is my niece… and I need to get her from Eli. And I need you to help me."_

"_What?" Rebecca asked not really understanding what Ari had just told her. "No. The Deputy Director told me that she is the daughter of a family who died in a terrorist attack." Rebecca could hear Ari scoff but she ignored him. "He was a close friend of the father and he wants the baby to grow up in safety. And how could she be your niece? That's just not possible, Ari."_

"_She is Ziva's daughter, Rebecca. And that bastard was no friend of Avigail's father. He had him killed. He made Ziva kill him. And now he took her from my sister." Now, that was the Ari she had left with a broken heart. That hatred and rage was back in his dark eyes and made them shine with something fearful… something dangerous._

"_What are you talking about? You are making me scared, Ari."_

"_Here." Ari threw a folder into her lap. He sounded impatient and annoyed. "Here is your terrorist attack." Rebecca looked at him questioningly. "Go ahead, look into it. After that you can call me insane and keep on protecting the almighty Eli David." Slowly Rebecca opened the folder and it didn't take her long to realize what she was looking at. A written order from the Deputy Director of Mossad on an Israeli attack on Israeli soil. _

"_But that is impossible." She gasped in horror. There it was, in black and white. The man, who was like a father to her ever since she was a little girl, was indeed capable of all the things he had been accused of by his own son. She felt nauseous. _

"_Impossible? Yes." Ari, more like sensing than seeing the woman's change in demeanor, softened his voice. "But when could impossible ever stop Eli David? Rebecca, he is not the man you want to see in him. He is a cruel man… a monster. He had killed all those innocent people out there; it was not HAMAS. It was all him… it was not enough for him to kill Anwar, he wanted his daughter, too. His granddaughter, Rebecca. And I can assure you that he does not want her to play the proud grandfather."_

"_But what can I do?" She looked at Ari with tears shining in her eyes. She didn't know how to deal with this situation. She was always in the background… she was someone who was practically invisible… invaluable but invisible._

"_Anything it takes. __I have to get Ziva and the baby out of Israel. Ziva is broken, Rebecca. If she cannot leave this whole mess behind, I am afraid that she will die."_

"_Ari, this whole thing that you said… Ziva, Anwar… the baby… oh my God… their baby… that is so terrible… and I cannot believe that I have a part in this…" She wasn't just invisible. The world was only a shadow for her. She could rarely see outside her office and she really didn't want to. She wasn't some frail woman who couldn't face harsh reality. No, she had already faced it when she saw her family getting killed. But that was the only way for her to cope. And it worked so well… she did what she was asked to do and she didn't ask anything. But now, with her friends' lives lost and ruin, she felt a strange urge… she had to do something._

"_You can help me make it right, my love." Ari cupped her cheek and Rebecca nodded resolutely._

_

* * *

_

Tony was throwing suspicious glances in his younger colleague's direction. Ever since Tony arrived, McGee was sitting in front of his computer grinning like an idiot. If Tony had wanted to be honest with himself, which he definitely didn't want to be, he would have said that McGee was looking exactly like him on a regular day.

He turned in his seat so that he was completely facing the younger man.

"Alright, McGee. What's up with you?" No reaction. Tony frowned then sighed and stood up. On his way to McGee's desk he patted Lora's head who was playing peacefully between the two desks, then he came to a stop just behind McGee. Still no reaction, so he took a look at the screen and almost instantly, he burst out laughing.

"Come on, Probie. ? Are you planning on making little McGeeks?" He shuddered at the thought.

"Tony." McGee turned to the other man annoyed. "Why it is so difficult for you to give me some space?"

"I don't know." Tony shrugged. "I like being in the same space as you, Probie. I really like the Probie-experience. It's really funny." Tony laughed and McGee rolled his eyes. "Now answer me ." Tony stopped laughing and now seemed quite serious. "Are you planning on making little McGeeks?"

"No, Tony, I'm not planning on it… not anymore, at least." And with that said, the idiotic grin returned to his face.

"You are scaring me, Probie." Tony frowned as he regarded the younger man. "Not anymore? What does it mean? Wait. If you are not planning on it anymore then you've already set into motion your devil plan to populate the planet with little ugly geeks who always know better. And, oh my… if you… then Abby… we are so dead. Little ugly geeks on CafPow. That's a terrible end…"

"Are you finished, Tony?"

"No! Have you thought about it? What would happ…"

"Not another word, Dinozzo." Abby stepped between Gibbs and McGee's desks with narrowed eyes. "Nobody will insult my baby." Tony gulped as he looked at the Goth who held her hands protectively over her belly.

"You're right, Abby." Well, this protective mother bear side of Abby really scared Tony. "With you as its mother, it's got a better chance to be a lovely child." He tried to smooth away the situation but Abby wasn't very amused.

"A chance? Tony, this baby will be the most adorable, the most beautiful baby on the planet."

"You know Abs, you might be right if it wasn't for my little girl."

"Tony, you don't have a little girl." McGee pointed out the obvious.

"Then who is this angel here?" Tony scooped up the little girl. "Isn't she the most beautiful baby on Earth?"

"Oh, my God, Tony!" Abby gasped seeing the clear fatherly pride on Tony's face. "You want to keep her." She ran to Tony and hugged him together with Lora, completely forgetting about his previous insults.

"Well, I'd like to adopt her, yes. But I'm still waiting for Director Vance to tell me what he managed to do in this matter."

"Director Vance?" McGee furrowed his brows.

"Yes. Everybody's favorite director is my last chance and he promised to help me."

"Well, Tony." McGee stood up to go and shake his friend's hand. "I'm happy for you and I really hope that everything will go just fine."

"Yeah, me too. And I'm happy for you, too. You know Abs that I wasn't serious about the little ugly guys." He smiled down at Abby who was still clinging to him. "But the geek part is totally viable, you kno… ouch!" Abby pinched Tony in the shoulder but she was smiling, too.

"Now that we cleared this…" She turned to McGee with hands on her hips. "Tim, why don't you put it up on the plasma while you are at it? Maybe there is still somebody who doesn't know."

"I'm sorry Abs. But you know how Tony is…"

"But I wanted to tell when everybody's together." Her tone was very close to whining.

"Tell what?" Gibbs appeared in the squad room with his family in tow. Just that thought made him walk more proudly then before. At his boss' question McGee's idiotic grin reappeared on his face as he looked at the Gibbses. Ziva smirked knowingly while she picked up Lora who was by her legs as soon as she saw her. Abby hit her boyfriend in the shoulder then ran up to Gibbs and literally jumped into his arms and mumbled the good news into his neck.

"Abs, I can't really hear you."

"She's just saying, Boss, that Probie here knocked her up." Tony supplied helpfully but suddenly he could feel an elbow sharply connecting with his gut and he looked at Ziva and the girls shocked when all three of them began to chuckle as he yelped.

"I didn't knock up anybody, Tony." McGee stated indignantly.

"Are you pregnant, Abs?" Gibbs looked at the woman still in his arms and after the Goth nodded happily, he turned to McGee with his best Gibbs glare. "I really hope, Tim, that you're planning on making a decent woman out of Abby."

"Oh, come on, Gibbs. It's the 21st century…" Abby looked at the older man but McGee took over.

"I can assure you, Boss, that Abby is already a decent woman… but yes… I'd like to marry her…" Well, maybe he didn't need to reassign him to the Antarctic after all, Gibbs noted satisfied but he was snapped out of his thoughts by Abby's high-pitched voice.

"What?" Abby looked shocked as she stared at her boyfriend. "McGee!" McGee gulped while Ziva and Tony winced collectively. That didn't look too good. Gibbs found the unfolding scene quite amusing, though.

"Umm, Abby…" McGee tried to put a sentence together and make that somewhat abrupt proposal seem just a little more intimate. "I mean… well... you know now that…" Well, he tried... and failed miserably.

"Now what? Now that you knocked me up!" Abby raised an eyebrow while the man was gaping like a fish. "What, McGee? The cat took your tongue?"

"Come on, man." Tony whispered to McGee. "Be a man and face the woman." With that he showed McGee to stand right in front of Abby who regarded him with narrowed eyes now.

"Abby… you know I didn't mean that." It seemed that the younger man began to collect himself. "I love you. I've loved you ever since I heard your voice over the phone… and I want to marry you. Baby or no baby. Though I'm really happy about the baby…" Here he giggled excitedly and suddenly Abby threw her arms around him.

"Oh, Timmy. I love you, too." She squeezed the man tightly. "And of course I'll marry you." And back was McGee's idiotic smile. Well, that would be a constant phenomenon for months to come.

"Thank God." Tony cried out then petted McGee on his shoulder grinning at the couple.

Gibbs shook the younger man's hand with a sincere smile. He was really happy that his girl had finally managed to find an honest guy. Ziva walked up, too, to the couple with Lora still in her arms and hugged first Abby then McGee both of whom giving her a grateful "thank you" then passing Lora back to Tony, she stood next to her husband sneaking an arm around his waist and pulling Avigail closer to her listening to Abby's happy babbling.

"You knew about that." Gibbs stated as he looked down at her. Ziva just shrugged with a knowing smile.

"Alright, people." Director Vance appeared in the squad room. "I really hope that I'll see some work done, too, today." The team looked just slightly chastised, well, except for Gibbs. He didn't look even slightly so. "You know, you really didn't give me much time to sleep at night. Not to mention the headache some of you caused me… but I hope I could help." Here both Tony and Gibbs straightened visibly while Ziva looked at her husband somewhat uncertain.

"Gibbs, here's the file you asked for." He handed a folder to the team leader but kept his eyes on Ziva. "Agent David, I hope it'll answer some of your questions concerning your daughter. However, I'm certain that you won't like most of the things in there. As for Avigail, she is to stay in your custody until the adoption papers come through." He petted the little girl's hair with a smile then turned to Tony. "Agent Dinozzo." Tony stood genuinely nervous in front of the director. "You certainly give me more credit than I deserve…" Tony's shoulders visibly slumped as he held Lora just a little bit tighter. "But I hope this will do." He handed a folder to Tony who took it uncertainly. "Your request for Lora Carpino's adoption will be considered. That's all I could do. The rest depends on you, Dinozzo." That was enough for Tony. He got the chance to prove that he could be a responsible father to his little girl. A huge grin erupted on his face as he looked down at Lora. "And I hope you are ready to take in the girl permanently." The director added.

"What?" Tony looked a little puzzled.

"You are her legal guardian Dinozzo." Vance indicated to the folder in his hand. "You just have to sign the papers."

"Thank you, Director." Vance nodded then turned to Abby.

"Miss Sciuto, we can talk about your maternity leave whenever you want." He told her with a hardly visible smile and genuine surprise appeared on his face when the happy Goth trotted up to him with open arms and took him in a crushing embrace.

"Thank you."

When Abby let him go, Vance smoothed down his jacket, somewhat embarrassed and with a last glance over the group, and especially Gibbs, who gave him a grateful nod, he left. But not without stressing his point once again about their work.

It was Tony's turn to accept congratulations and once again, Gibbs looked at his wife accusingly.

"You knew about that, too." Ziva laughed out.

"You should know by now, my dear, that I know about everything." She gave him a wink while Gibbs just scoffed.

"It looks like that we were left out of the party, Dr Mallard." Palmer noted in a humorous tone as he entered the squad room with Ducky.

"Yes, Mr Palmer, it looks very much like that." The old ME agreed. "Can we ask what happened here?"

By the time Abby had finished her account about Avigail, Tony's decision on adopting Lora and her being pregnant with McGee's child, a playful smirk was playing on Ducky's lips.

"Well, Mr Palmer. Are you getting a child, too?" Ducky raised an eyebrow as he turned to his stunned assistant questioningly.

**TBC**

_Thanks__ for reading!_

_I'm a little unsure about the plot, or more precisely about me being clear about the happenings in the past. I have a quite clear timeline in my head but it might not be that obvious for you, guys. So if there is anything that is not clear, feel free to point out!_

_The last chapter is coming up… if you are patient enough! :-P_


	13. Family

**Fighting the Darkness**

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything._

_It was good to see that nobody got confused. I haven't left anything out then… good. So here we are…the last chapter…_

_Enjoy!_

Chapter 13: Family

Gibbs shot up in bed fully awake. He blinked once or twice in the darkness then turned to take a look at the clock on the bedside table. It read 3:38 a.m.. He blinked once again. All was quiet in the house. Except that it was a loud crash that put him on alert. For a few seconds he was listening trying to process the situation. He was alone in bed, that was for sure and that left only one viable conclusion. His wife must have been the source of that crash. He slowly lay back in the bed and with a deep sigh he rubbed his tired eyes. What was Ziva up to now?

Slowly he climbed out of bed and made his way out of the bedroom. On his way down he peeked into Avigail's room. The little girl was sleeping peacefully. He smiled at his daughter's sleeping form shaking his head. When Avigail came to live with them, he had quickly come to realize that his mini Ziva, as Abby liked to call her, could sleep through even a bombing attack.

As Gibbs continued down the stairs, he realized the noises were coming from the kitchen. He rolled his eyes. In the last few months Ziva had taken up a new habit. She would be wandering around the house in the ungodly hours of morning. It didn't matter that it was housecleaning, doing the laundry or just watching TV, if Ziva felt like doing it, she would surely do it.

That was the reason why, after rounding the corner to the living room, Gibbs could see his wife… well, he didn't really know what she had been doing. But she was swearing like a trooper, that one was for sure, even though Gibbs couldn't understand a word. As he stepped closer, he realized what the problem was and what had been the reason for that crash that had woken him.

On the kitchen floor, there was the blender in the middle of a pool of milk and fruit. And Ziva was desperately trying to clean it up. Or more precisely, she was desperately trying to find the right position to be able to clean it up. Gibbs wanted to laugh out but he quickly changed his mind. He could tell that Ziva had already been angry enough… So he stepped up to her with a neutral expression.

"Let me do this." He told him as he gently took the wiping cloth from her hand.

"I can do it, Jethro." Ziva told him annoyed as Gibbs picked up the blender then started to wipe up the mess. "I am not an invalid."

"Sure you can do it." Gibbs chuckled to himself then straightened up after he finished cleaning up. "And what the hell were you doing down here anyway?" He turned to his wife with a raised eyebrow. "It's not even four yet."

"I wanted to drink a shake but that stupid machine jumped down from the counter." Ziva was suddenly on the verge of tears as she looked up at her husband.

"Oh, come on, my little assassin." Gibbs stepped closer to her using a soothing tone, but smiling nonetheless. Ziva, missing the amused smile on Gibbs' face, immediately stepped into his arms. "Do you still want to drink one?" Ziva just shook her head still fighting with the tears. Gibbs sighed. "What to you want then?" He asked gently.

"Sleep?" Ziva whined like a little child as she buried her face deeper into his chest.

"Then what are we waiting for?"

"I cannot."

"You can't?"

"Yes, I cannot." When Ziva raised her head up to look at him, she was suddenly back to being annoyed. Gibbs raised an eyebrow in question. Ziva only narrowed her eyes at that. "Because your evil little spawn is just like you. He can go with only three hours of sleep… three hours… and obviously he is not taking it now." Gibbs smiled in spite of his wife's accusing stare and reached up to put a hand on her large belly to feel the baby kicking away happily. "Argh…" Ziva cried out frustrated. "I so want to wipe that grin from your face… I am suffering from sleep deprivation here and you are totally enjoying the situation."

"Come on." Gibbs kissed her on the forehead and gently nudged her to start towards the living room. Silently they settle down on the couch where Ziva lay between her husband's legs with her back to his chest while one of Gibbs' legs was pulled up somewhat on the couch and the other was on the floor.

As Ziva was lying there, she could finally relax as Gibbs continued gently stroking her belly. Gibbs raised an eyebrow questioningly when he could hear Ziva scoff.

"What?" He asked.

"Nothing." Ziva answered shaking her head slightly and smiled when Gibbs pressed his cheek to her head. "It just figures that the baby calms down for you and not for me."

"I'm good, huh." Gibbs smirked and Ziva chuckled as she closed her eyes. While running her hand up and down on the lower part of her husband's leg, she slowly drifted off to sleep.

The couple was woken up not so long after that by an insistent Avigail who claimed that she was hungry and she wanted to eat her dad's pancakes. At 6 a.m.. Gibbs stood up chuckling to himself. Yes, she was her mini Ziva… only one thing could make her leave her bed that early in the morning… her stomach.

* * *

"Zeeevah… Zeeevah…" Lora squealed delightedly as she saw the Israeli woman standing by the plasma. She was obviously in a deep conversation with McGee but the three-year-old clearly didn't care. It was painfully obvious that the little girl was spending too much time with Tony. "Zeeevah…"

Ziva turned towards the little girl just in time to see the little ball of energy throw herself at her legs. For a moment her eyes went wide in surprise as she lost her carefully maintained balance when Lora bounced on her but fortunately McGee caught her in time and helped her steady herself once again.

"Hi there, Angel." She laughed up heartily while the girl was clinging to Ziva's legs. With one hand unconsciously drawing soothing circles on her large belly, she stroked Lora's head affectionately. McGee smiled at the scene before him then with a roll of his eyes he leant down to scoop up the little girl, who had let go of Ziva's legs and was now standing in front of him with raised hands. "McGoo, up!", she demanded.

"You know, Tony, you should really teach her some manner." McGee looked at Tony exasperated when the man joined them.

"No need to, McGoo." Tony grinned at his friend deliberately using his nickname. "She's a very polite little girl, aren't you Lora? What do you say when you want something?"

"Pleeeeease…"

"See?" Tony looked at McGee proudly. "And now, give me my lunch, will you, Probie? I'm starving."

"Like father, like daughter." Ziva said shrugging when McGee looked at her mildly annoyed at Tony's lack of manner.

"You've just been out. Haven't you had lunch?" McGee turned back to Tony.

"I've been busy with something else." He explained as he looked around the four desks searching for food. "So you are saying that you've got no food for me."

"Pretty much, Tony." The younger man nodded.

"Alright then." Tony shrugged. "I think I just have to eat your…" Tony went to McGee's desk and peeped into the paper bag that was sitting on it. "…Chinese. Great." By that time McGee looked genuinely annoyed and Ziva was watching Tony grabbing the bag and sitting down by his desk with sheer amusement. "Come on, Pumpkin, it's lunchtime."

The little girl squirmed out of McGee's arms and ran to Tony to sit in his lap.

"Why does it always have to be me?" McGee asked no one in particular but Tony took it upon himself to answer nonetheless.

"Because I'm not stupid enough to eat Gibbs' food and I'm definitely not stupid enough to eat the other Gibbs' food… especially when she comes in XXL size." He delivered his explanation matter-of-factly while he was chewing happily on his food.

Ziva wasn't even bothered to make any comment on his remark about her size, which was really remarkable indeed. Tony's annoying remarks concerning pregnant women had been a daily occurrence ever since Abby began to show and since Ziva had begun to show around the time that Abby gave birth to Cassie, they kind of became the integral part of their lives.

So she slowly made her way to her desk without any word and bumped down into her chair while McGee sulked silently by his own desk throwing angry glances in Tony's direction.

"Hey, Timmy." Ziva called to him while rummaging through the large paper bag on her desk. "Here. I can spare one." And with that she threw something through the squad room. McGee caught it and looked at it suspiciously.

"What?" Ziva asked him when she didn't get any reaction from him.

"Uhm, is it your special cheese sandwich?" McGee asked carefully trying very hard to keep up a straight face. Ziva just nodded while she took a large bite from her own sandwich. McGee gulped looking at the thing in his hand as if it were a bizarre result of some kind of alien experiment and a collective 'eww' could be heard from the direction of Tony's desk. Everybody, even Lora, knew that Ziva's infamous special cheese sandwich was containing numerous ingredients that definitely should not be in a sandwich… some of them should not even be in any kind of food at all…

"I do not understand what the problem is." Ziva stated indignantly. "Are you not hungry, Tim?"

"Yes, I am. Thank you, Ziva." McGee forced a smile on his face then wrapped out the sandwich. He didn't take a bite, though; he just kept staring at it as if waiting for it to speak up at any moment. He had just gathered all of his strengths and opened his mouth to finally take a bite when the sandwich miraculously disappeared from his grasp.

"Have this one, McGee." He could hear Gibbs' voice and in the next instant a paper bag was flying in his direction.

"Thanks, Boss." He glanced at the team leader gratefully and clearly relieved that he'd got rid of that thing.

Ziva smiled at Gibbs as he began to eat and she happily reached for another one of her special sandwiches. "Trust a marine stomach to take in any nuclear waste." Tony muttered to himself amused that Gibbs could actually eat that stuff.

"So, Lora." Tony began after the two of them had finished with McGee's lunch." Have you told them the big news?"

"I got a new name!" The little girl all but squealed in her fathers lap and the adults couldn't help the smile as they looked at the happy child.

"Really? And what is your new name?" Ziva inquired enthusiastically which made the already chipper child more excited. "Lo'a Dinozzo."

"God help us." McGee muttered under his breath. That was just what the world needed: another Dinozzo.

"I don't think he can, McGee." Gibbs smirked while Tony looked so proud that one could think that his chest would burst any moment.

* * *

Abby eyed Ziva suspiciously as they walked in the isle of baby clothes in the supermarket, baby McGee sleeping peacefully in a surprisingly normal looking stroller. Abby didn't say anything but she noticed the way the Israeli woman was looking at the cute little blue outfits. The team was constantly asking about the gender of the youngest Gibbs but the expecting couple just kept on shaking their heads with a ghost of smile on their lips claiming that they didn't want to know. But Abby was dying with curiosity.

"Come on, Ziva. Spit it." She finally spoke up and Ziva looked at her puzzled.

"What?"

"You are having a boy." Abby beamed.

"Abby, we don't know that."

"Oh, yes, you do. You can't even take your eyes off of the boy clothes. You are so busted, Ziva:" The Goth exclaimed merrily.

"Abby, I really do not know…" Ziva said but then a small smile appeared on her face as she took a little baby blue bodysuit into her hand. "It is more like a feeling." She shrugged at once.

"Ah… that famous Gibbs kinda gut feeling." Abby nodded in understanding.

"In Jethro's case, yes." Ziva nodded. "In mine, it is more like motherly intuition."

"And what do you call that." Abby laughed up when she caught sight of Avigail approaching them with a blue plush gorilla in hand.

"Wistful thinking." Ziva stated smiling, looking at her daughter. And indeed, Avigail wasn't shy about voicing her hopes about a little brother. "What have you got, angel?" Ziva looked down at her daughter.

"I found this gorilla. It's just like ours… just a little bigger… and it's blue." Avigail furrowed her brows as she regarded the toy in her hand deep in thoughts and Ziva couldn't help laughing out while Abby just stood there with a huge grin.

"Yes, it is definitely just like ours." Ziva stroked the girl's hair then looked up when she could hear some noise approaching in the already noisy area. She could bet that it was Dinozzo.

"We're ready to roll, girls." Tony appeared at the end of the isle pushing a cart full of food in front of him.

They were on their way to an impromptu picnic which Abby insisted on going on. She had shown up in the Navy Yard with little Cassie, practically threatening everybody with serious bodily harm if they hadn't lift up their butts and accompany her in the park. She did love being a mother but she missed spending time with the team. So she took it upon herself to keep the others entertained by different social programs. And that was the reason why Team Gibbs was in a supermarket on its way to the park with Tony, McGee and Gibbs on food duty, Palmer and Ducky on beverage duty and the girls just wandering around.

"We've got everything for a hearty meal." Tony informed the girls proudly.

"Thank God!" Ziva exclaimed. "Let's go, I am starving."

"Say something that's new Zeevah." Tony rolled his eyes then quickly closed them when he could feel Gibbs' hand connect with his scalp.

"Where are Tim and Lora?" Abby asked when she noticed their absence. Tony laughed out.

"Well, your hubby and my little girl are currently wandering around the Barbie section… I don't want to worry you, Abs, but he seemed to genuinely enjoying himself." Tony chuckled as he took a few steps away from Gibbs warily. Then he noticed something.

"That's a blue bodysuit in your hand, Ziva?" He raised an eyebrow pointing at the object in question.

"That was a question or a statement, Tony?" Ziva raised an eyebrow in return handing the clothes to Gibbs who chuckled at the sight of the dancing hippos on its front.

"You're having a boy."

"You don't sound too happy about it, Dinozzo." Gibbs observed looking up from the bodysuit.

"Well, it's really great, Boss." Tony forced a smile on his face. "But I've just lost 50 bucks." He added under his breath, bowing his head in defeat.

"And why is that… Dinozzo?" Gibbs asked the younger man.

"Well… Boss…" Tony's head snapped up and he began to stammer. "You see… It's not like we bet or anything…" Gibbs raised an eyebrow. "…well, maybe we did…" He admitted finally. Ziva laughed up.

"And you lost." She smiled at Tony.

"That means that Timmy won." Abby stated proudly.

"Not exactly." Tony had to break down her enthusiasm. "He said that it'd be a girl."

"What did you say then?" Gibbs inquired slightly amused.

"Well, I might say that it'll be two girls." Seeing Gibbs look, Tony deemed it necessary to elaborate. "I mean, Boss… Look at Ziva I can't believe that that kid's is alone in there." He pointed out and took another step away from Gibbs. But this time it was Ziva's hand that had found its way to the back of Tony's head. That was one too many comment about her size for one day.

"I am not that huge." She stated indignantly.

"Oh, you are, Zeevah." And even Gibbs couldn't refute this statement. Ziva looked shocked at her husband then turned her head to a giggling Avigail.

"Who won the bet then?" Abby quickly chimed in.

"The autopsy gremlin." Tony frowned. "He put his money on the boy."

"He may be right." Ziva shrugged.

"May be?" Tony asked.

"Well, we don't know, Dinozzo." Gibbs pointed out.

"But…" Tony began in confusion but then understanding appeared in his eyes. "Oh… I see. You have a gut feeling, Boss, don't you? Oh, damn. It's really a boy then."

"Alright." Gibbs rolled his eyes. "Let's get out of here."

The team met up by the cashier and not long after that they were once again on their way to the park.

As Ziva made her way to the rest of the team, who had already arrived at the park, with an arm around her husband and watching their little girl running up to Palmer and Tony, who were running around a ball with a giggling Lora, she couldn't help the happy smile that erupted on her face. She could hear Abby chatting away merrily with Ducky sitting on a blanket nearby while McGee was lying on his side next to them tickling his baby girl's tummy.

As she beamed up at Gibbs, who pulled her closer and planted a kiss on her forehead, she wondered if Gibbs knew what she was thinking about… she wondered if he knew that she thought of that little group of so different people as one family. She had a feeling, though, that Gibbs knew all that… because they were their family.

**THE END**

_Wow, I finished the story… and now I'm on the verge of tears… __I'll really miss it! Thank you for being here with me! It was a great experience for me and I hope you think the same!_


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